Pre-Menstrual and feeling pissed off with DP…AIBU?!

[Anxiousanne01]

I love my DP dearly, I do, but honestly….he can be so stuffy and boring sometimes.

He is going away for work next week, goes Monday, back Friday. He has tomorrow, Friday and the weekend off work, I am away this weekend, going to visit my best friend who lives a couple of hours drive away and go to a ball with her. I felt a bit guilty leaving him on his own for the weekend, especially as he said he had no plans and would be a bit bored and lonely.

Friend texted me this morning to say that her husband has now got the weekend off work so why don’t we make it a couple thing and all go to the ball as she could get a couple of spare tickets for them. I said I’d have to check with him but I’m sure it’d be fine as he has the weekend off work and hasn’t got any plans. She said to let her know by 11.30 as she would have to get the extra tickets by then.

I planned to go up Saturday lunchtime and come back Sunday lunchtime as I have plans Sunday at 3pm, so need to be back for 2 latest really.

Texted him at 9.10am to see if he was interested, delivered but he hadn’t read it, fine (he’s wasn’t at work as he doesn’t start until 3pm today) Texted him again re something else and again delivered, but not read.

11.10 am I try to ring him as I know my friend needed to know. Just rang a couple of times and then said ‘The person you are calling is not available, please try again later.’ Argh.

Finally see he read the texts at 11.40, no response, he finally responds at 11.50am to say ‘Sorry, but I’ll pass as going away with work Monday.’

I’m tired, pre-menstrual and grumpy and I admit it really annoyed me. He has the weekend off, he’s admitted he’s got no plans, I have to be back for 2pm on Sunday anyway so it’s not like we’d be back late Sunday eve, I’d understand it if we were. I guess I just feel a bit hurt that he would rather sit about on his own all weekend than spend the weekend with me doing something fun.

I’m now feeling in a grump with him and don’t want to speak to him, just texted my friend and told her not to get him a ticket as he won’t come. I know it’s hardly the end of the world and doesn’t make him a bad BF but I just feel really irked.

Urgh, tell me to stop being a childish bitch, I know I’m being one.

When he said he would be bored and lonely, that was said for your benefit....

What he really meant was "brilliant a day and night to myself"

I think it's the fact he is going away next week and isn't really that bothered about seeing you this weekend is what is making you feel like this.

Having said that, I don't think it's a major issue!

I think you need to stop focusing on him and his enjoyment and just think of yourself, he seems to be doing that.

Maybe he doesn't want to go to a ball and would rather stay home.

I may be a bit bias on this as I am an introvert, but maybe he just can't cope with all the social interaction? I know that if I was facing a week away from home with work then I would feel like I needed to spend the weekend before that recharging my batteries by staying home. I'm not "stuffy" (at least I hope not), I just find that lots of social interaction makes me feel knackered. Whereas meet-ups involving 2 or 3 people are fine. A ball followed by a week away with work is a lot of people-time.

If this sounds like it might apply to him then maybe suggest meeting up one-on-one over the weekend. That way you get to see him but he doesn't have to deal with lots of people and can recharge before his week away.

Sorry you're full of PMT, I prescribe , lots and lots of !!

I agree with Banana. If I was going away for a week id need more than Sunday evening to prepare, both practically and 'mentally'.

It's up to him how he spends his time, as long as in general you feel that you spend quality time together and you're important to him.

Thanks for the replies. I didn’t sleep well last night and have a headache and have been grumpy all day, the slightest thing is setting me off so I think I’m just taking it out on him a bit.

I get where you are all coming from re wanting to stay at home and charge the batteries before a week away with work, I do. I guess I’m just disappointed that’s all as it’s not often we get to spend the weekends together as he works 2 in 4 and I’m often busy on them etc too and also not often that we get to spend time with my best friend and her husband. I guess I also feel a bit sad that I won’t be seeing him for 5 days next week and thought it would be nice to spend the weekend together if we got the chance (which we have)

Never mind, worse things have happened at sea.

If I was having to undergo the torture of being away for work, I would keep the entire weekend before free of any social engagements. This would be so I could have lots of time and space for ME before being swallowed up by other people.

So I'm with your dh