So very angry and upset. I'm six months pregnant, due to get married in 3 weeks.
Been with DP, living together, about 3 years, the main - almost the only - thing we argue about is his friends, including his ex-girlfriend. she is at the centre of a group of friends he was part of when he lived in the south of the country, he now lives in the north (moved to be near his children from previous marriage) but has often gone down to visit them, always on his own - I've never met any of these people. So you can understand why resentment starts to build up. They have frequently invited him (and only him) on long haul holidays he can't afford (a couple of years ago he went with them, which nearly split us up) and I know they've tried to get him to move back down south, they even fixed him up a job down there, and two of them fell out with him when he didn't take it, so he hasn't been down so much in the last year, thankfully.
then he got an invite - for him alone - to his ex girlfriend's son's wedding. Now, surely it's not normal, when two people live together, to invite only one? and even less normal to accept?
I told him, calmly, I would prefer him not to go. I think his social relationship with his ex, and excluding me, is increasingly innappropriate when there is a baby on the way - then he admitted that he hadn't even told any of these friends that I'm pregnant. Or that we're getting married. He says he'll tell them at the wedding, and he's gone, although there is really no need for him to spend two nights there. Oh, and he's staying at his ex girfriend's house.
Believe it or not, I actually do not think he would cheat on me with this woman - for a start she's twenty years my senior, and they never had much of a physical relationship to start with.
But she and these other people are wealthy, throw lots of parties, have sailing boats and no dependent children - I feel that I can't compete, that our social life is dull in comparison and that I'm going to spend weekend after weekend up here with the baby while he buggers off to relive his single days. And I can't face it. tomorrow I'm going to the estate agent to enquire about rental properties in the area. And I don't think I want the baby anymore.
written down like this, I can see what an asshole he sounds. But he is a decent, kind, intelligent man, and a fantastic father to the children he has. But he seems willing to ruin our relationship for the sake of these friends. It's causing me so much stress I couldn't go to work today, I've been crying for about 24 hrs and I don't know what to do.