I've join MN purely to get peeps opinion, as I anticipate that I'll get a fair, honest and measured hearing here compared to forums I normally frequent where it's likely I'll get laughed outta town!
Anyway, I'll try and make this as short as possible without leaving out any vital information:
I'm a guy in my late twenties and have started a new job about a month ago. Incidentally, the job is great but it's not exactly what I'm used to or something which find really fulfilling but jobs and job and hopefully I can move on next year. ANYWAY....
So, on my first week I get ferried across departments, basically to sit with and understand their roles before starting my actual job in the second week. On the third day, I'm sitting with one of the guys as his talking me through what his doing when this girls walks past, I smiled at her and she smiled back. (she must have been off on the second day when I was in her dept).
Now, I'm not stupid, I know she was smiling to be polite. However, I think you know where this is going, so yeah, my heart skipped a beat, literally everything I find attractive, I'm actually amazed I smiled rather than my jaw hitting the floor!
Now, we're three weeks out and I can't stop thinking about her. Massive crush, and the horrible thing is I have never spoken to her, and the chances of being able to engineer the opportunity are slim to none - different departments on different floors, different lunchtime, and on the odd occasion she has been in my office, it's impossible for me to just straight up go and talk to her because it's just going to get people asking questions - it's a very quiet dept. She doesn't seem to know I'm even there :(
The other issue with just talking to her, other than the aforementioned impossibility, is that I'm been burned before, the 'friend-zone' nonsense making it impossible to go further without upsetting things. In short, [i]I don't want to be her friend[/I], to put it bluntly.
I do know bits about her - I'm quite certain she is single, she is popular, respected and appears altogether lovely.
So, after a lot of thought, I'm sitting here thinking the only safe, practical and least potentially creepy option is to become a 'secret admirer'.
IF I go through with this, I had this itinerary in mind:
Week 1 - Leave flowers with a small handwritten note on/in the boot of her car (she sometimes drive her parents SUV), on the days when she finishes later than me. I figured that this is least likely to a) be noticed by anyone else, b) unlikely to come across in any way as creepy, and c) show her that I'm thoughtful and a little brave. In the note I'd say something along the lines of "if you liked the flowers, say thank you on your Facebook (we're not FB friends but it's and open account)", which obviously would give me the go ahead for...
Week 2 - this is where it turns a bit brave. Now, leaving something on her car again will just be a bit one dimensional as I've done it once, so I'd send chocolates to her VIA WORK, so that she'd have them delivered to her department and everyone she works with would see it! The logic being that she would share the chocolates, let on to them about the flowers, and then her colleagues would basically do my work for me by pushing her to keep going. Again, in the note would be the Facebook thank you line to confirm back to me that she is still interested.
Now, at this stage I'm a little unsure of whether to go for a third gift (what else is there?!), or go for the big one...
Week 3 - I would book a table at a nice restaurant, and then send her (again via the post at work) an invitation to a date. The only risk is that I book on night she can't attend. Again, asking her to confirm on Facebook.
What do we think? I'm a little unsure on the Facebook element, but the only alternative is to set-up an email address, but the problem there is that she might be hesitant to share her personal email address, though I suppose she could use her work email address.