When did you realise you had met the right one?

[wingsflyby]

Does it feel differently? I am seeing a new guy and he is lovely, but after a few failed relationships, I wonder if it's just another one that will go wrong.

I did fall in love with my husband, but I certainly didn't know he was 'The One' (not that there is just One probably) until about 6-9 months in and even then I was a bit ambivalent about moving in/getting married as well as excited.

All these stories about seeing someone and knowing in 20 min, I have a couple of friends like that, the rest of us just met someone, muddled along a bit, fell in love along the way and ended up together because it became more, not less certain over time.

I don't think one way is the right way, it's lovely to have those memories of the first year or two when you are really besotted, but it would take me about 6 months to become besotted with someone because I like to know them inside out before falling for them.

I have felt in lust within 10 min of meeting many guys, but that's not really the same thing!

He was/is interested in my welfare not just what he could get from me/from the relationship.

If we were at a loose end he could make something out of nothing i.e. one Sunday evening we didn't know what to do so he got a listings magazine. So with a copy of, 'Time Out' in one hand and an 'A-Z' of London in the other we found a better than nothing film and drove from East London to West London to see it. The café next door was a blast too !

That was better than shrugging and switching the t.v. (basically staying in, in the horrible house-share living room) and then going to bed.

I just felt he could see the short, medium and long term and plan for it.

It was very comfortable and easy and he's lovely. And I missed him when he wasn't around. I don't usually miss people.

I do wonder whether some of the "instant" thing might be to do with smell, the smell of the back of DH's neck is like catnip to a cat with me, even thinking about it makes me feel loved up! (maybe I'm just odd)

All I could ask for was someone who treated me well. And my dp of 4 years has done so. he's a great father to our son. He has accepted my daughter who is now 8 as his own child. He works hard, respects me and we are best friends.

The night I met my DH we both knew we would get married. This year is our 23rd wedding Anniversary but we've been together 24 years.

I just knew, within seconds it felt like. But I know lots of couples for whom it was a slower burn. If he makes you happy at the moment that's all that really matters, isn't it? :)