Help needed - FSD side effects post SSRI (AD)

[MayMay]

I had to go on a SSRI antidepressant several years ago (Paroxetine) and, although the leaflet said all side effects should disappear once you stopped taking them, the lack of desire (libido) continued and my previous libido never returned. In fact is has got worse to the extent of virtual non-existence. Pre ADs I was a twice a day, MIN 5 days a week person... now I can take it or leave it for days/weeks.
I have written to countless pharmaceutical companies, drug researchers and experimenters etc asking for help and to see if they could recommend anything and have gone on countless websites looking for something which will reverse this FSD but there seems to be nothing except a drug (inhaler based) which is only at experimental stages(Bremelanotide)and is a couple of years away from general release - if successful!
The trouble is that the problem has been caused in the brain (where the AD targets the depression problem) and therefore all herbal, medication and other treatments which target moods, blood flow and the like do not work. Yes they may make you more relaxed, get blood flow to the important bits and get you lubricated (sorry, disgusting) but the problem is I have no desire to get started in the first place.. the horniness has disappeared.
I wondered if anyone else had a similar experience and had tried something (successfully)??? It´s causing an awful lot of probs cos DH loves me to bits and me him but whereas I used to wear him out I cringe at the thought of him coming on to me cos I really, really don´t want any... and he is very understandably feeling rejected and I have to give in even if I don´t want it just to try and keep that side of our relationship going between us. He says he doesn´t want to please himself, he wants me. Please HELP!
Thank you.

Morning, sorry to hear about your loss of libido - I have had this since the birth of my DS (now 2) although not related to SSRIs, related to depression generally. I can understand why you're looking to the SSRIs and they do cause loss of libido (I'm a nurse), but looking at something to "blame" may not help find the answer. Couple of suggestions - depresion may have gone but the cause may still be there and need addressing via some other means, such as counselling, homeopathy or different SSRI depending on where you sit on the whole alternative thing! Although SSRIs work by adjusting your chemicals, unless you deal with the cause you will end up back where you started (as a nurse, who manages people off work with depression I see this every working day). Have a think about what the root cause may be of the depression and the loss of libido - it is the change in body image (be honest about the wobbly bits if you have them), change in feeling down there (had a section so can't help on that one I'm afraid!), can't get your head around being a Mum rather than a woman? All common reasons and I know a few of those apply to me (particularly the wobby bits!). If you have a toddler and are worried about privacy then get a lock on the door (or a babygate on their door so you can relax!), or go away for the weekend. May also be worth thinnking about what you found so attractive about DH before the SSRIs and look to rekindle that. TBH mine was v low, same as you but once I psyched myself up and bought shares in KY things worked and I enjoyed it, albeit on a very occasional basis. Men don't get that we're the problem not them no matter how often and how bluntly you say it - and will feel rejected, there's not a lot you can do about that other than keep telling him. I do have some good news though, in the last 2 days things have improved - why? Bought a rampant rabbit from that well known shop, and without even using it libido has improved - twice in 2 days as opposed to once a month! So that may well be worth a try. Good luck and I do hope that you work it out in the end.

Thank you Judessis,

Unfortunately (or fortunately as the case may be) I know that it was only the SSRIs which caused the problem as the libido went downhill from the 2nd day of taking them, it was almost instantaneous. Also, even when I was in a depressed state and right up to when I took the ADs I had an extremely high libido. My depression (I assume was caused by delayed reaction on break up of my marriage, death of my dad and finally getting rid of a boyfriend who was no good for me 2 years previously).

DD at that time was around 8yrs old and I have no other younger children. I had had a C-section 8 years previously so it isn´t my "bits" which have been messed with...

I didn´t have any wobbly bits when the loss of libido started as I had got down to 8 1/2 stone and a size 10, had had a boob job and looked great for the first time ever. I had a relatively new partner of around 1-2 yrs who thought I was the sexiest thing ever so not that. He still does by the way, tells me every day. So it isn´t anything to do with crap relationship, feeling bad about my body or change in body circumstances like recently giving birth, menapause or hysterectomy...

I would welcome any alternative medecine suggestions though. I have been taking Ginko for about 2 weeks but no change yet. Plus that supposedly only targets the blood flow problem which I don´t think I have anyway.

Morning MayMay

Well to start with, I sympathise with you aswell as understanding where you are at.
Like you I was on AD's(about 7yrs altogether)!

I can only remember having a high sex drive before kids come along-DS(9y)DD(3y). Since then it has never been the same,but whilst on AD's I had NO desire at all, well...I had sex-enjoyed it, but the drive to do it was just not there.
I eventually went to the dr about it & she explained that I may have to take AD's for the rest of my life & the lack of desire will always feel that way whilst on them. SO I made the decision then to come of them, but it was a slow process. I was weaned off them over an 8wk period. Because I never wanted to ever go back on them I have taken St Johns Wart, they appear to have kept me on an even regarding the depression, & my desire to have sex is alot better than it was but never the same as it was yrs ago.
Usually-anything herbal will take around 2 months to kick in-its just waiting really.

Every month my libido is up&down, but sometimes just before my period or sometimes during I feel quite horny (which is great)I just wish I felt that way all the time.
My DH sounds like yours too, he to thinks the world of me & finds me sexy, so I wonder myself where the problem lies.
I think the only problem with St Johns Wort is...you cant take it continuesly,(sp) you have to have breaks from it. I did this & took Ginko (like You)but I suffer bad with PMT so prefered the St Johns wort to that.

Dont feel like ive been much help really, but at least your not alone.

Got another idea really if you wanna keep on chatting....this will take all day to read otherwise

Message withdrawn

Are you still around MayMay?

Well I'll add some advise if it helps...thats of coarse if you havnt tried already.

When my sex drive was low...I found out DH had been looking on the "net" at Porn..well mainly women! Not just men & women shaggin, but women "gettin off". I was absoltely gob smacked at the time, it made me feel like he was cheating on me. I came on MN & got lots of different opinions/feedback to it, which made me feel a whole lot better about the situation.

But.......what i least expected to do was to go on the site myself.... yes I was too.
I found myself gettin rather turned on by it, & there is nothing to be ashamed of either.
I then decided to get myself some nice underwear(basque, baby dolls, suspenders etc.) If you feel sexy then you will have more desire to want sex. I felt that jsut putting on the underwear under my nightgown,(without DH knowing) then giving him a peak at it or just asking him to take off my gown etc made me really "up for it"
So now...rather than feeling pressured by DH about no having sex-I was innitiating it & it made me want to do it again.
I dont feel like this all the time but its helped alot.
Im not saying DH pressures me into it-he doesnt, but I know when we have not had it for a while he's going to be wanting it!
For them, whats better than us making the move. Its good for both of you.
You appear to be not self-contious of your figure-SO if you got it-flaunt it Girl.....
Good luck-hope this helps.

Thanks Music Lover and Dior..

The sad thing is I was only on the AD for about 8 months and weaned myself off but they were Paroxetine and from what I have read since they are the worst ones ever for FSD. Great! I have been on countless websites trying to find out the cause and, like I said in my first post, arousal starts in the brain so it isn´t something you can medicate via blood stimulation and relaxation etc (unfortunately).

I haven´t even taken them for about 6 years so if there was anything to come out of my system it would have done by now. Sometimes I´m OK when we get started but more often than not wish I hadn´t even agreed to it! I just go to bed hoping he will fall asleep before asking me. Thankfully DH wouldn´t look at porn as he knows I am dead against and I know he won´t cheat on me but I want to be a willing participant and I just dread it now when I used to be so up for it all the time.

I do appreciate your suggestions but I can´t say I even want to put negligées on etc (although I have plenty from before).. it just makes me dread what´s coming even moreso. Perhaps it´s been so long since I´ve felt randy that there´s no hope for me?

The depression hasn´t returned though so I don´t need ADs any longer. I even recently emailed a professor of a Uni in the US who had carried out trials on many drugs but every experiement had been inconclusive in it´s effectiveness v the placebo

Here is the link on the drug Bremolanotide which I mentioned beforehand. You need to scroll down to reach the FSD bit as (as usual) men´s SD is more important and is therefore addressed first!!! I have subscribed to the bulletin so that I am updated as soon as any progress is made.
www.bremolanotide.com/bremelanotide-bulletin/

is this it

Yes it is. Aren´t you clever? I don´t know how you all do those links. If you look to the right you will see "B.. home".. click on that and you can read up a bit on it. As it says, it is different from all other so called female viagras because it targets the nervous system and not the genitals which is where the problem arises, especially if you have SSRI FSD as the AD kill it off! Interesting, no?

Im no dr Maymay & you may not have depression, but it sounds like you have symptoms that are associated with depression.
Do you not think that this could be the likely cause of loss of libido rather than the
"after-longterm effects of Ad's)

I would concentrate on looking further afield rather than maybe becoming fixed on one thing.

You can have a certain amount of control over your brain & how it thinks/works. Sometimes giving it a try may help.

Have you ever considered having -say-the female version of "viagra"

Why would you think I have depression? Because I lack interest alltogether? Surely that affects loads of women who are not necessarily depressed!

that was my first link by the way, never been able to do them. Hoory!

X post also

I didnt say you have depression-I said symptoms that are associated with depression

Ahhh... let me know what you think once you´ve read a bit... you too Dior. Sounds promesing but still in trial stages. I would volunteer but don´t think they´ll ship me back and forth from Spain to US! lol