Lied! Now what to do

[Outnumbrd]

Ok, really need some help! I'm single with 4 kids, only 2 little oned live with me at present. I've been single for ages, getting on with life. Met a guy over a year ago when I was not looking for one, had several dates, then lost touch. One year on, we are back in touch, have had 2 dates in the past week, and I really like him, am at a different place in my life and we have another date set up. Problem... back when I first met him, I told him I had 2 children, the youngest 2! Why? I don't know!! I'm judged alot for being what people consider too young to have 4 kids, although I'm over that now, I was particularly sensitive back then. So, I respect this guy and just wabt him to know the truth, then whatever happens, happens! How do I tell him?!

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thank you :)

No response from him yet.... lol

How old are your other children and why don't they live with you? Assume they are grown up and moved on. Is that the case?

they are teens, I moved for work, they didn't want to, so it just worked out....

I know hesterton! It would be red flag for me too!! Well, maybe he's just enjoying the weekend with his daughter and too busy to think about this. He did talk about a date tonight so I guess I'll know his feelings as he should be getting in touch about that!
TBH, the dates were all drinking dates last time, it's only this week we had lunch and it felt a bit more kind of like it could lead somewhere.
Not sure about phone call, I might seem a bit needy if he doesn't respond and I start calling him ! ?

Four is a very nice number of children. Guess how many I had.

But last year we had maybe 6 dates and this week since getting back in touch, 2, so it's not like we were spending loads a time together and I've been living a double life. Just a bit awkward to now drop them in conversation. When I mention I'm a mum in London, people always look surprised and ask how old is he/she? then I have to say erm well 4 actually.... it's the same story everytime, shock, horror, disbelief, like I'm a freak lol! Maybe I have a massive paranoid chip on my shoulder now!!!

Don't know Annie? 5?

15?

He's only gone and replied! Wants me to tell him more when we meet tonight!! hahaha! Yes, thx girls!!
Next question, I'm crap at choosing men, how do I know if he's a fucking psycho or not??! He seems very proper, not my usual type, but my usual type are awful! lol!!

If he walks over this, he's not worth having....

I have four DC and people comment but also in the little culdesac where I live now apart from the pensioners out of the younger families all but one have at least 4 DC. Next door to the right have two, next door to the left have 5, directly opposite have three under 6 and one on the way. IMO it is not common but not worthy of remarks either. My mum also had four and I had my first at 20 and am 31 now so am used to the 'you're too young' 'you're mad' comments. My mum also had four so I grew up with experience of the comments. Do not take it personally, people say these things often in a well intentioned way but don't understand. If they are saying them to be mean the only thing worth bothering about is that they are being mean not what they are saying and the only bothering you should do in response is to write them off as mean!!

Good luck with the new relationship btw. Try to listen to your instincts. If you've been with abusers in the past remember to trust yourself and that if it feels wrong for any reason, even if you are worried you are being unreasonable, just end it. You don't need to be super reasonable just because you've had shitty relationships in the past and you can leave a relationship for any reason you like, you're the best judge of what is right (and wrong) for you.