Please be gentle with me, as I am reeling atm. I have namechanged but you may recognise me as a regular poster on here. So sorry for the epic post but I need to brain dump.
Background: When I was in my teens I was very vulnerable. My parents were going through a horrendous divorce and I was in a relationship with someone that I now recognise as abusive. My best friend at the time met and started going out with a man who I had a bit of a crush on tbh at first as he was good looking, charismatic and seemed lovely. To cut a long story short he then started to reveal himself as (in hindsight) a total fucking psycho. He used to boast about killing animals and was into some very dark fucked up stuff that I won't go into even though it's relevant as I just cant even go there in my head.
In short we were all terrified of him and he manipulated all of us as a result. He then got my friend pregnant and they got married. She was only 18 at the time and I was 17. As my relationship nose dived he came with her to 'rescue me' and take me to their house (I lived 70 odd miles away) and while I was there singled me out and one night told me that I was his and we were going to be together. She was almost about to give birth at this point. I didn't know what to do. I loved her very much but had no idea how to get out of the situation I was in and couldn't see any way out. He was an absolute evil bastard to her and when she gave birth he was vile. I ended up going home after about a week and what followed was the worst year of my life. He fucked my head up so much and all the time I felt completely trapped and horrendously guilty as I loved my friend and he put her (and me) through so much.
At one point he came with an equally fucked up friend of his to stay with me for several months in my tiny flat. He also invited another bloke who was in the group to live there as well, so I had three men living in my flat that I didnt want there. It was sheer hell. While they were there he used to verbally and emotionally abuse me and hurt my kittens. One of the worst times he filled a party popper with pepper and fired it in their faces. I tried to protect them and he absolutely ripped me to pieces in front of his friends and none of them tried to stop him or stood up for me. They eventually left and my cats never really recovered and were extremely timid and terrified of men for years after. Bastard.
After a year of this hell he (thankfully) dumped me in the most humiliating way he could and I was finally free. I moved into a new flat and tried to get on with my life. When I had been there for a few months he somehow found me and threatened me to never tell his wife. I ended up going back out with my ex boyfriend (who had found himself on the receiving end of the psycho) and found out that he had cheated on his wife with several other women. I was a nervous wreck for a long time and ended up in an abusive marriage which I escaped from 9 years ago.
About 5 years ago I had a message on FB from his wife, my friend who informed me that they were still together, were very happy and had two more kids together. To say I was upset for her was an understatement. I sent a reply back saying that I hoped he no longer abused her and that I wished her and her kids all the best with life. I didn't tell her what had happened as I couldn't bear the thought of hurting her and I just hoped that he really had changed.
Fast forward to yesterday when I received an email through my business website. From the psycho. With the names of all the people who were involved in the whole thing and the message "You should address all the people you fucked over in your previous life before you start healing strangers". (I am a therapist.)
I have been through a whole range of emotions. Most of all I am fucking raging. How DARE he think that he can still mess with me. It was over 20 years ago and I am not the scared 17 year old any more. I know the right thing to do is to ignore him and move on but I so want to send her a screenshot of the message, or do something to show him I'm not a fucking victim any more. But I still care about her and still feel horrendously guilty about what happened and realise that he is still an evil bastard and is almost certainly still evil to her as well.
So there you go. My head fuck. WTAF should I do? Please help me.