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Original poster

What are my obligations would you say

28 replies

Newbrummie · 19/05/2015 14:14

Dickhead, has been telephoning his children 3 times a week up to Christmas. The kids and I then returned to the uk and now he is demanding skype's. Now firstly he hadn't paid a cent in child support since Christmas, secondly I cannot afford wifi, he's been given a landline number he can call but if course that doesn't suit as he'd have to pay for the call.
I can't seriously be expected to do this in costa or something using their wifi can I ? The library have said no in no uncertain terms.

OP posts:
Horsemad · 19/05/2015 14:32

Tell him no.

Original poster
Newbrummie · 19/05/2015 14:34

Lol I have ... He's throwing his toys out of the pram

OP posts:
Anniegetyourgun · 19/05/2015 15:07

I would say your obligations are to make your children available to receive calls at the agreed time. If their dad can't be bothered to make those calls that's not your problem. Unless and until he obtains a court order that says you have to provide Skype access, I don't see there's anything else a reasonable person would expect of you. I suppose if he were genuinely bankrupt and you were loaded it would be a nice gesture for you to pay for the phone calls, but as you say you can't afford wifi I don't imagine that is the case.

GoatsDoRoam · 19/05/2015 15:24

You've told him what the landline number is. It's his choice to decline to use it.

Original poster
Newbrummie · 19/05/2015 15:34

Yeah that's what I thought tbh he missed and swapped around phone calls and went over his allocated 20 mins all the time and I never said a word. I'd hate to be unreasonable, but equally I think he's taking the piss

OP posts:
cestlavielife · 19/05/2015 15:39

if the DC are desperate to skype their dad then yes you should arrange something...if they indifferent then no. it is about the dc.

Rosieliveson · 19/05/2015 15:42

If you don't have Skype then you don't have Skype. Surely that's the end of it.
You aren't being unreasonable. You have told him how you the DC can be contacted and he is choosing not to contact them.

AlternativeTentacles · 19/05/2015 16:41

'I don't have skype. So that would be impossible wouldn't it. Unless you want to pay for me to have the internet of course in which case, no problem-o'.

despomum41 · 19/05/2015 16:48

if he is so tetchy about it he knows what he needs to do , how old are your kids ?

tootiredtothink · 19/05/2015 16:56

Obviously I have no idea of background but I'd say your obligations are to your children.

Helping them maintain a relationship with their dad will help them so please don't let your dislike of him cloud this. Them seeing their dad will be so much easier for them than talking down a phone.

How are you accessing mumsnet? Can you not use Skype same way?

faitaccompli · 19/05/2015 17:48

He can call a landline from skype for a few pennies - I use it all the time.

Original poster
Newbrummie · 19/05/2015 18:06

This is the thing it's about laying down the law to me and if I don't do x he won't do y and we all end up frustrated. I just want nothing to do with the man, his sense of entitlement is breath taking

OP posts:
nicenewdusters · 19/05/2015 18:19

He wants you to pay for something you can't afford. You've offered an alternative. If he doesn't like the alternative he pays for his preferred choice. If he's paying no maintenance he's going to spend a long time looking for that leg to stand on !

Original poster
Newbrummie · 19/05/2015 18:44

??

OP posts:
Original poster
Newbrummie · 19/05/2015 18:44

:-) that should be ... That's what I'm
Dealing with here

OP posts:
ratinkitchen · 20/05/2015 22:52

BT to BT landline offer free calls after 7pm for one hour
Put the phone down after an hour, you can make another free phone call, free each hour until a set time

I expect other phone companies offer similar

What about letter ?

Original poster
Newbrummie · 21/05/2015 07:38

He's not in the UK but even so they do sell calling cards for $10 he could have a good 30 min chat with but he hasn't the brains or inclination to come up with that

OP posts:
Original poster
Newbrummie · 21/05/2015 07:39

Letters again ... Hasn't thought of that all by himself and given I am not his wife and no longer have to wipe his arse for him, I'm not suggesting it. It's not rocket science is it if you were bothered about contact.

OP posts:
Whatamayday · 21/05/2015 07:41

Why can't you Skype if you have the Internet?

PuellaEstCornelia · 21/05/2015 08:03

Mayday, she said she doesn't have wifi

Original poster
Newbrummie · 21/05/2015 08:08

I'm on my phone on Mumsnet, I can't have all data used by him frankly when he isn't contributing, I'm on a tight budget.

OP posts:
TheHobbit · 21/05/2015 08:09

You can phone through Facebook or whatsupp instead if Skype

Original poster
Newbrummie · 21/05/2015 08:13

Yes he could that's right if he had the brains to sign up to such things

OP posts:
Original poster
Newbrummie · 21/05/2015 08:14

Although both require wifi don't they

OP posts:
faitaccompli · 21/05/2015 11:36

I already said - he can do a Skype call from ANYWHERE in the world to an LANDLINE or MOBILE in the world. It is incredibly cheap to do it that way and the OP does NOT need skyp or wifi to do it - just a landline.

Honestly - I use this for work all the time when I am abroad - it saves us a fortune.