Just need to get this off my chest

[Esssss]

I've posted a few times about my unhappy marriage. It's still unhappy and we are again at a point where we are splitting up - this happens a lot but we're both sick of it and getting to a point where we are being really nasty to each other. We have an 18
Month old and in our early grand plan thought we'd have a second child on the way soon.

Anyway, this is what I feel saddest about , that my ds won't have a brother or sister. I know I might go on to have another relationship and child but I could never believe it and I feel devestated.

Stupid I know considering all the shot this will cause in every area of our life. But this is what I feel saddest about.

Just wanted to get that off my chest after a pretty upsetting and horrendous morning

They might well have a brother or sister in the future - you and your H could both meet other people or you could choose to have bother child alone.

Thanks Party, it's silly really I know.

It's not silly it sounds like you're having a really tough time. There's nothing to say you won't have another dc and even if you didn't there are loads of positive things about having an only child.

I remember meeting a mum from my first postnatal group. I was expecting my second. She said she was separated and wistfully said she wished she had gone on to have another baby before they split.
its a valid feeling

Sorry you are feeling such regret, OP. It's very understandable to feel a type of nostalgia and to feel the loss of the future you dreamed of. I'm sure that as time passes, you will find another vision of the future replacing the old one. And not minimizing your desire for a second child at this time as myneighbor indicated, so-called "only" children are often very, very happy (and have very happy moms)! Best of luck!

Thank you all for your very kind messages. It's just been a rubbish day....I'm doubting whether it's the right thing but we haven't been happy for a long time. I keep having irrational thoughts about staying together to have another child and then realising how completely selfish it is!! I'm just sad

I was in an EA relationship with a twisted, clingy, paranoid, controlling little man. We were together up until my DD was 17 months old. He finally moved out September 2013. I am now married to a wonderful man, my and my Dh were friends for years who lost touch when we both changed jobs, we got talking again when he split with his ex and I split with dds dad. I also have a 3 month old DD to my husband. I honestly couldn't be happier, I'm proof, and I'm sure many others on here are, that you can find happiness after having children, my main concern was that nobody would want to be with a 20 year old single parent, I was wrong. please don't stay with this man if it isn't best for YOU, put yourself first and everything else will fall into place.

Thank you ravioli that sounds really positive. I'm a bit older than you so don't feel like I've got as much time, but then again you never know.

Ok.
Firstly I have two half sisters-no difference.
Also I'm remarried and have a child with dh, my other children adore her and she them, they are just brothers and sisters!
I had dd when I was 44 too, so don't lose hope yet.
When you split up you worry about every thing, it's totally normal.
Good luck

Ledkr, thank you so much - it doesn't help that I am massively broody either!