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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

still love ex husband

3 replies

movingonishard · 13/05/2015 22:48

We've been divorced over2 years and had a hellish time sorting out the divorce. He behaved horribly (and very distubingly) during this time.
However despite having been out with numerous men since, I still miss him and wish things could have worked. We still go out with ds for special occasions and have a lovely time. I told him a few months ago i still miss him some times but i get the feeling he's not interested. Any advice anyone? TIA

OP posts:
Datingonline · 14/05/2015 06:36

Hi have you had any counselling? You seem to believe that this man is the best you can get. You need to work on your self esteem. Sure he can be nice for occasional days out but that's not the real him which you know but don't want to fully accept.

What does your life look like? Do you have a job, friend, hobbies? If you filled your life with fun stuff and nice people you would not be missing your ex. You are not missing him exactly anyway just the company and the concept of a connection.

Start focussing on you and what you need / want and make it happen. Try new things, courses, meetup.com, etc etc.

Best of luck!

AuntieStella · 14/05/2015 06:44

"I get the feeling he's not interested"

It's great that you're on amicable enough terms to be able to go out together with your DS.

But never forget that this is normally 'making the best of it for the sake of the children' and not a sign of secret longing to get back together.

It's pretty normal to miss someone who was a big part of your life, and to remember the good bits sometimes, rather than the full reality which led to divorce.

Do not put your life on hold because of that. Keep busy and keep dating.

CarpeJugulum · 14/05/2015 06:48

You miss what could have been. The memory of what you thought he was.

It doesn't matter whether he's interested or not; it's how you deal with yourself. Kindly, and try to work out how to make yourself feel better - counselling, talking to friends etc so that you are in a good place for you and DS.

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