Friend advice, unsure what to do and need a few quick answers...

[hentogo]

Ok potted history -
Friends for around 20 years.
Don't live near but have kept in touch until around the time friend met b/f
Was still going out with other friends and text occasionally but I tried to stay in more contact but got fed up with it being one way so gave up.

She is now getting married... Got the engagement text 2 weeks after and now 2 weeks before the hen do I get an invite from a friend.

Not sure if to go?

Haven't been invited the wedding as yet

Am I a last minute invite?

Any words of wisdom?

I don't think I would bother

Do you want to go? I personally couldn't be bothered so wouldn't, but pre child when I had more energy I might of gone just for a night out excuse.

I suppose I just feel really hurt. She played a part in my wedding and yet I haven't even met the groom! I have said plenty of times when you are visiting let me know etc but nothing.
One way I want to go as it will be nice to catch up and yes an excuse for a girlie break from the kids but then another way I am worrying if I will be invited to the wedding and wonder why I am being invited so late :(

The girl organising did say they decided last week and I do believe her but just feel a bit deflated..

I would probably go, friendships ebb and flow - is it worth losing the friendship over?

yeah I kind of think that but just needed longer than two weeks as have two dcs and lots going on so bit tricky such short bloomin notice.

I would go, this is an opportunity to keep your friendship going - albeit on different terms. It would be a shame to end the friendship.

don't think I am now. Just had the details and I would need to be at the venue early which I cant make due to the 2 dcs and then by the time the thing gets going I would have to leave due to train home :(
Live 2 hours away.

I just feel its all been organised already and with 10 days to go its not easier for me to just arrange ( have 2 dcs with special needs )
I don't feel its me ending the friendship, surely its the other way around?

You really want to throw away a 20 year friendship over her not getting in touch sooner, up to you, I'd go, you have time to plan.

Have you actually tried to organise child care for the 2 DCs or have you just decided that 'it will be too difficult' so want to use it as an excuse?

It's a shame to throw away an opportunity to catch up with your other friends if you are just feeling a bit peeved over a late invite.

Not an excuse its a reality. With living two hours away it would mean me going to the hen do for 4 hours with 4 hours travel and leaving them to carry on with the party as no hotel offer or anything.

Ok yes may be ok but maybe I just feel bloody cross that I am such a late thought. I had an awful time with two disabled dcs and she hasn't been there for me at all. Actually now I type that maybe that's the real issue, im bloody cross