Making Friends Motivation Club/thread

[1000lemons]

Hi all,

I've noticed there are regularly threads on Mumsnet about people who don't have many or any friends. They really hit home with me because I'm in the same position.

I thought it might be a good idea to start a club/thread for those of us who want to make friends so that we can

1. Talk about the challenges of making friends as an adult.
2. Encourage each other to get out more in the face of anxiety and rejection!
3. Provide a space to rant in when we are feeling down.
4. Celebrate each others successes and achievements.
5. Try to identify the buffers and obstacles we face to making friends in a supportive 'constructive criticism' kind of way.
6. Be a positive and friendly space generally.

This thread isn't specifically for finding Mumsnet Friends, but if that happens as a by product - that's great!

If you are interested please add your story to this thread.

Hello my name is 1000lemons!

My Story

I'm a married SAHM of one, DS 3.

I used to have friends but since becoming a SAHM I've really struggled to make friends. I don't get much time to go out which doesn't help.

My 'issues'

• I'm a bit introverted
• I don't like drinking or boozy nights out which isolates me from many people
• I have some as yet unidentified thing which puts people off me, particularly women. I always seem to get pushed to the outside in female groups. I'm hoping to work out what it is that I do wrong!

What I'm doing about it

• Joined a local community gardening group.

• Attending a local craft night event.

• Joined an online friends socialising thing.

Hi everyone. I'm HarryLimeFoxtrot, and I really don't have many friends.

I have two children: DD (10) and DS (9). I don't really know many of the school mums as I work FT, so I only ever collect the DC from afterschool clubs.

I do stay in touch with some old school friends, but I don't see them much as I live almost 200 miles away from where I grew up. I also stay in touch with friends from uni, but these days we are scattered around the globe.

I did make some new friends about 5 years ago when I career-changed and went on lots of courses with work. Now I'm qualified I don't get to go to courses anymore, and I'm much busier at work (as are the friends I made).

Recently I've joined the choir at work in an attempt to meet new people. Often I can't go to the concerts as DP isn't home in time to look after the kids. But I still get to chat to people I otherwise wouldn't know during the weekly rehearsals.

I've also been to one MN meet-up, and I will shortly go to another. This pushes me completely out of my comfort zone. I'm an introvert, and I'm pretty sure I'm on the high-functioning end of the autism spectrum, although I've never bothered getting a diagnosis to confirm this.

I'm totally in the same situation a sahm of 3 boys under the age of 4. I lost all my friends when my first son was born. The first few months of being a new mummy and recovering from a csection I didn't want to go out much in the end they stopped asking. I've met a couple of ppl in the last few years thru kids groups etc but I seem to find and don't know if it's just me but busy mums seem to not be that intreasted in new friendships? Like the ppl have their close friends already and don't bother with new ones?