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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Do i stay or do i go?

4 replies

c14497h · 29/04/2015 15:01

I'm 18 and am currently living with my son's dad and his mum and her husband. I moved away from my family in (about 2 hours away) so that my son and I could live with his dad as a family, and also so that we could get our own place together, however a year and 5 months later we're still here.... I've asked my boyfriend lots of times for us to move out and we worked everything out money wise and worked out that we can afford it, but he keeps putting it off and saying that we'll save for a few months and hen move out... and then it never happens! I've said to him I'm really unhappy right now as I don't to live with his mum and step Dad anymore as we don't really get on and they charge us quite a lot of rent so it's really hard to save anyway, I feel so unhappy at the moment because of it and I just feel like I'm trapped here. So I've said to my boyfriend that I'm going to move back to my mums if we don't move out before July (as that's when I finish college for the year), his reply was that i could stay with them for the summer and save, then we will get our own place in September, but how do I know that he's just telling me what I want to hear? (like he always does) I feel like my only way out is to split up with my boyfriend and do my own thing, i don't know what other options i have! I don't want to be trapped here anymore!

OP posts:
Cherryapple1 · 29/04/2015 15:14

So leave him. He can say what he wants but his actions are at odds with that aren't they? You are so young to settle for this. And his parents charging you lots - surely you would be paying that out to live elsewhere anyway? Sounds to me like he doesn't want to move out. What do you mean when you say you don't get on. Are they unkind to you?

c14497h · 29/04/2015 15:18

cherryapple1 - they're not unkind - I just suppose we all have our different ways of doing things which can make things quite difficult

OP posts:
Jackie0 · 29/04/2015 15:19

As a student I think you might get help with housing and childcare if you needed to go it alone.
It would be worth looking into.
Don't count on your bf, he's already shown you that his wishes come first.

Joysmum · 29/04/2015 15:30

I think you've done the right thing by laying it on the line and keeping the status quo until you've finished college. You don't need angst jeophardising the end of your course.

I think this needs to be your final stand. Finish your course, then either move with him or move away from him.

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