Need a bit of support please people… Sorry it’s a long one…
Over the past couple of years OH has been getting into legal highs. He used to do a bit of weed here and there, but I think he struggled to get hold of it, so when one of those head shops popped up on our local high street about 5 years ago he took full advantage. At this point I was heavily pg with DS and we’d been married a couple of years . The first I knew of the problem was when he appeared to have a fit on his 40th Birthday. I was petrified and called an ambulance thinking he’d been poisoned or something. Midway through the call he came round and managed to talk me into aborting the call. He then told me what he’d been up to. I was pretty upset but he reassured me it was a one-off.
The same thing happened again a little while later and this time I made him speak to the 999 woman – I wanted nothing more to do with it. Over the past few years this has happened on and off on occasion. Most recently this weekend when he spent most of Sunday passed out in DS’s toy box and flailing around the garden convinced there were projections in the sky!
The thing that really pisses me off is that he sees nothing wrong in doing this around the children – it’s SO not the environment I envisaged my children growing up in – it’s setting a really bad example for them as much as anything else. He really doesn’t see that he’s doing anything wrong, and always bats it back at me saying I’m being unreasonable.
Basically I’ve not really known what to do about it. I won’t leave him as I refuse to leave our home, and I doubt very much he’d leave if I asked him to, although this is what I threatened him with this weekend. I did manage to get him to hand the stuff over so I could dispose of it. (Usually I have to hunt it down – he’s become more elaborate at hiding it and lying about it – something else which I find really hurtful). I’ve never been able to speak about this before to anyone so sorry for the ramble, I think it helps to get it all down. I’m thinking if there’s a next time I might start talking about it more openly with everyone so he can’t hide it anymore. (BTW he’s a professional guy with a highly paid career, and I have never even tried this stuff. )
Anyone got any advice? Please go easy on me, I know I’m perpetuating the problem by staying with him but I refuse to share my children with him – at least this way they have one decent parent 100% of the time.