It's over, my first night on my own.

[Endler32]

After many years of threatening to leave, wanting to leave my dh I have taken the huge step. He left this morning, I broke the news to dd1 (she has been brilliant ).

I want to thank the people on the thread ( I can't remember the name of the three ) about the lady who's dh/dp drove off after threatening to commit suicide. My dh had threatened this several tailed when I had mentioned splitting up, he had a huge hold over me, I was worried that my dc's would blame me if he took his life, I was scared and not strong enough to leave.

Dh is safe, with a friend and seems reasonably ok, he knows that it's over and there is no going back and he has promised to get help so he can be a good dad to the dc's.

I feel a mess, my hart is hurting for the dc's and I feel like I have lost my best friend, I know I have done the right thing for me and the dc's, I know we will be happy and hopefully the future looks bright. For now I am grieving but it will get better.

I'm so pleased I finally went through with it even though I'm a mess.

Well done, it really does get better.

My thoughts go out to you, I've been there (twice), you're not alone and I totally sympathise with how you must. I think you have a bright future with your positivity.

You are so very brave and dignified. You will pull through and round the grieving process that will most likely take hold but you have a head start on it, knowing that you needed this to happen. You are awesome. I'm sorry for your pain but it is natural and you'll get through it

Kids have gone to bed, feeling very lonely , I don't have many close friends, not many people to talk to ( thanks to him ). Things will get easier, tomorrow I carry on as normal for the sake of the dc's.

You've done a hugely important thing. It's the start of things.

You have exactly the right mindset for this journey. Tomorrow and tomorrow, one sunny day after another. Even if it's cloudy the sun is there. I'm the queen of nonsense tonight, apparently! In any case, you have a place here to talk and the rest will come.

Best of luck to you. Stay strong.x

Thank you, I made it through the first night, have had no sleep but I am ok, things will get better from now on, going to get the dd's ready for school have a bath and carry on , I just hope no one asks me how I am when I'm doing the school run.