words of wisdom please?

[ggg123]

This isn't a relationship thread but I have had so much support here before I wanted to post here, hope you don't mind? !
I am in a position once again... trying to cut a very long past 4 years short, its been a roller coaster. Again, I am in a position where I can't keep up with mortgage payments (Just been told i mo longer have work in my position) didnt get im to uni again! House is up for sale. I really can't take any more. Do I walk away? I will be black listed forever? I have fought so hard with going back to college, scraping money together for school uniforms, repairs on the house, car, and in between not had maintenance (I do now) I have had an awful experience dating (given up hope) put on 2 stone (feel rubbish) had issues with bed times, eating times and I know alot of this is just life and I am moaning and I promise you I am or try to be so positive, always try to find a plan b with the thought of its not meant to be. I am just tired of the climb! I don't see a light at the end of the tunnel anymore :(
I'm hoping for some words of wisdom. I don't have a close family and feeling more lonely than ever.

Have you been negotiating with your mortgage provider? What do they say?

I've only just consolidated all arrears I had when my husband left. There is nothing they can offer me :(

How about posting on the Money Matters thread as well, you might get some advice re mortgages etc there ?

Sorry you've found yourself in this position, it looks like you've tried so hard and done all the "right" things. There will be a light at the end of the tunnel, it's just that your tunnel has got a bit bloody longer !!

Good luck

Thankyou :)
Hope so! I know there are people worse off than me. Just feel so alone.
The crazy thing is my dad has money not that I expect it but it could completely change my life

Is your dad in a position to loan you any money, at a lower rate and over a longer period than a bank would ?

Yes he is he has thousands doing nothing but my dad has never been consistent in my life ie forgot birthdays and goes months without seeing us. He knows what situation im in. He has promised me and my girls a holiday 2 years running.

OK firstly, have you asked your dad for money? If not, do it, and nail his foot to the floor until he's handed it over.

If that's not an option, have you checked out with CAB what your housing options are? Are you on the local authority list for re-housing? Is there enough equity in the house for you to rent somewhere - you'd probably need to pay a year up front if you're not currently working.

Have you got any emotional support from friends and family?

Hello ggg

Ok oe thing at a timen

Have you spoken to your mortgage provider ?

Can you rent out a room/s in your house for make some extra income ?

If you sell your house can you downsize to a smaller house & free up some money ?

Can you get a job & find an online or evening course instead or a job that includes training as part of the job role ? instead of being a full time student

Try taking time out for yourself & your family out before thinking about further dating

Can you make a list of things that need doing & find some that you can easily acheive ?
immediate things must do
short term plans
long term plans

Make a list of all outgoing bills, is there anything that you can change or cut out ?

If you have been working for 2 years I dont think a company can end your employment, unless the hours do not fit in with your studies

You could try posting your question in money section too

We all have good times & bad times

Good luck

The thing is my dad has always been in and out of my life and I feel sometimes that does more damage than having a dad that stays away. I have reached a point in my life where I would rather him stay away so asking him would mean feeling I had to carry on putting up with him being a pretty shitty dad. He doesn't like spending money he likes to see it mount up.
My mum has offered me to live with her and she advises to hand the keysback the ex.
I could then go onto a housing list. Its our home but I feel exhausted.
I can't downsize its small anyway and I have only recently consolidated arrears. My mortgage is 700 a month compared to friends that only have half that. The mortgage company said I can reduce payment until sale but it will effect my credit rating. Or hand the keys to the ex who is holidaying in france as we speak (not bitter just sad for my kids)
I have made a list thankyou :) firstly new job, anything!
Thanks for all the advice its nice to know there are some kind people out there!

ggg123, I don't know the whole back story but be careful about 'handing the keys back and walking away' If the house sells for less than you owe they will chase you.

Also, handing the keys to the ex. If you are both on the mortgage and he doesn't pay it they will come after you for it and you won't even be living there. nd if it's opnly you on the mortgage and the ex moves in I doubt he'll pay it so you're stuffed there as well.

Sorry to be such a downer. Please get some good professional advice, some solicitors do a free session

why dont you rent your house out ?

www.moneysavingexpert.com/loans/debt-help-plan#dc

There are free debt management sources mentioned on his site that could help you.

Words of wisdom: this is not your forever. Even if you lose everything you can still work your way back. You have decades still to go and a world of possibilities. Never ever give up.

Thankyou everyone, really appreciate it :)
I have to change mortgage to let it out and its more than what I can ask for as it is.
I'm searching for work at the moment, just don't know how single mums do this through the holidays and shifts etc. Hopefully something comes up so I can pay my mortgage. Not sure if I could ask for a lower percent without ex's say so. Not sure I could get another mortgage to agree anyway with my track record.
job first anyway, I can't think past that at the moment.
Thanks to everyone :)