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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Don't feel the same anymore...

4 replies

aggie4684 · 20/04/2015 11:58

Me and my boyfriend have been together just over a year, we got pregnant quickly (unplanned but very happy) after meeting. Our daughter is 12 weeks old. Our relationship has just got worse and worse since she was born. I had saved money so I could stay off work longer with my daughter, but he saved nothing. So now I'm earning less as I'm on maternity but I've had to use it to cover his half of the rent (I usually paid upfront and he'd slowly pay me over the month) and to buy food etc, I now have nothing left every time I talk to him about contributing more he just says I'm being mean and picking on him.

There has been other things such as he wasn't showering, I spoke him about this and he said it was because he was down because there hasn't been any physical contact between us for a while. I had a difficult birth and pretty nervous about having sex again. Which I've explained to him, but he's pushing for me to go to the doctors to ask about my sex drive.

I've also noticed over the past few days he's using his phone a lot more, he's never been one to text or use his phone a lot. But it's always going off at the moment. Is he seeing someone else? I try asking him but he laughs at me like its a joke. He is also spending more time out with friends, this goes back to money, how is he affording this when he says he can't even afford to get some food in?

I'm starting to feel so distant from him and I just don't think I feel the same anymore. Do I continue trying or just cut the cord and leave? It breaks my heart that my daughter might not have her parents together and that I'll have to go with not seeing her every day (when she visits him) but am i staying for those reasons? I have no idea anymore! Hmm

OP posts:
Jan45 · 20/04/2015 12:05

Never works staying together because of a child, sounds like the relationship is dead in the water, you are short of money even though he has joint responsibility and yes I'd find the phone thing suspicious, sounds like he doesn't really give a damn, what's to stay for.

aggie4684 · 20/04/2015 12:09

Yeah your right. He originally left me when I was 10weeks pregnant. It's been difficult for me since then to trust him. But once again when I try talking to him about it I'm being mean....

OP posts:
pictish · 20/04/2015 12:15

He blames his lack of personal hygiene on not getting sex? Shock Grin
Cheeky get.

I agree it's not looking good. Don't think he's the fella for you is he?

aggie4684 · 20/04/2015 12:24

Ye my reply to "why haven't we had sex recently" was " because you smell" you shouldn't have to tell a grown man you need to shower. No I'm starting to think that he probably isn't x

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