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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Feeling overwhelmed and a bit obsessive!

6 replies

Tigger83 · 19/04/2015 11:10

So I'm 9 days in to a horrible breakup with him cheating on me and where my oh has now turned into someone I don't know. I posted a looooong post last week. I've made the decision to buy him out and he is dragging his heels so I have got more legal advice as to how I can get it moving. I went home on Friday to do 2 more valuations as the oh had requested and when I showed them 'his' bedroom I'd got a feeling something was wrong after they left pulled back the covers and there were woman's hairs all over the bed. The one thing he promised me he wouldn't do is bring her to my home.
I phoned him up and accused him of it and he made out I was mad and unreasonable and hung up on me. I text him saying I can't believe how low he'd sunk and I got a response back basically saying he deleted the message without reading it and he doesn't give a fuck about my opinion etc. I was in bits.

I am now compulsively checking his facebook as he still has me and him as a profile picture and us as in a relationship (despite the fact I removed him from mine) I've also found out that he has joined Twitter (which was always a waste of time in his eyes) and so has his ow. So I've been checking that and the ow's husbands Twitter.
It's like I can't help myself. Any tips on what I can do to make myself stop and stop caring about him. I'm now having dreams about him and me getting back together which isn't something I really want in my heart of hearts.

I wish I could get angry but I'm just sad.

OP posts:
winkywinkola · 19/04/2015 11:12

Well you will be sad. Your oh is a creep.

I would only have official contact through solicitors and the like.

No texts. Block his number and FB.

He sounds like he really wants to hurt your feelings.

Cherryapple1 · 19/04/2015 11:57

block him everywhere you can and make your own FB as private as possible. And stop looking at the OW on twitter. Block her there too.

Tigger83 · 19/04/2015 13:52

I just can't bring myself to do it. I know that's pathetic x

OP posts:
Cherryapple1 · 19/04/2015 14:55

well if you keep looking you are just hurting yourself. Take some control back and block him. What good does it serve if you know what he is up to - absolutely none.

AlternativeTentacles · 19/04/2015 15:30

You are on the verge of becoming a stalker ex. Do not fall into this trap. You need to block him and sort yourself out.

pocketsaviour · 19/04/2015 16:48

pulled back the covers and there were woman's hairs all over the bed.

So she's going bald? Nice.

So about blocking him on social media, you said
"I just can't bring myself to do it. I know that's pathetic"

OK, so what do you want from posting here? Because that's what everyone's going to suggest. You really need to gather your dignity around you and stop engaging at an emotional level. All it's going to accomplish is to make you miserable and him angry and therefore more likely to be a twat about selling.

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