Been with dh 15yrs (married for 9) 3 dc 7 5 and 7 wks. There's so many things to mention I don't know where to start
- dh has always been very self centred, if he doesn't benefit from a situation then he ain't interested. He won't put himself out for nobody (our dc included)
- he doesn't offer me any emotional support at all. My dm had cancer several years ago naturally I was devastated and worried, not once did I even get a hug or even asked if I was ok. I moved back to my Mums for a couple of weeks when she came out of hospital to look after her he didn't visit once or even ring to ask if I was ok or needed help. We had a mmc 2yrs ago naturally I was devastated his response was it wasn't meant to be get over it.
- during this latest pregnancy I had some medical issues that meant I needed extra monitoring etc. It was all a big inconvenience to him that I had to go to hospital even taking myself to labour ward for reduced movement because he was hungover and didn't want to waste his time sat in the hospital. By the end I went in every day to be monitored before they could induce he never came once or even asked how I'd got on even getting fil to take me (last person you want with you on labour wars is your fil even tho he's a nice man).
*the birth - he made no secret of the fact he didn't want to be there it's boring for him. In the end I was induced my Mum took me in to the hospital why he went football. I had to labour pretty much by myself dh came at the very last minute 15 mins before he was born and huffed & puffed clock watching until he could leave again.
- since ds3 was born dh has moved out the bedroom - he's only ever work once (odd occasion twice) in the night and now sleeps 9-6 so he's not going to be kept awake with a crying baby before working the next day. He's not fed bathed him or changed a single nappy most interaction he has Is a kiss goodnight, if I pass dc over to him he will have a quick cuddle then he's put down again.
- my dm paid for flights for the 5 of us to go on holiday next month. Flights were booked well before Xmas so not last minute dh has not saved a single penny for our holiday and keeps telling our very excited dc that were not going.
There's probably loads more I could say but there's the edited highlights. I'm already asking myself as I'm writing this " what the fuck am I still doing here??". Why am I allowing this to happen? He doesn't give 2 hoots about me which makes me wonder why he stays.
We both work I can't fault him for his work ethic he's always worked hard and put the hours in but I suspect he works so much so he doesn't have to be at home.
I have no idea where to go from here or what to do next? I'm kidding myself that he'll 1 day change and start to give a shit about anyone but himself.
I have really really bad credit so would not pass a check to move out with the dc to rent somewhere I feel totally stuck.
Sorry for the long rant. What can I do??