Three's a crowd! Why does this ALWAYS happen to me?

[SuchAPurpleGlass]

Just been on the school run, walking along chatting to a friend. Halfway along the walk another friend of hers joined us and that was it, I was out of the conversation. I tried to join back in but my friend was in the middle and was turned to face the other friend as we walked along and they didn't listen to me! However this friend of mine will happily just walk past me and say hello but carry on talking to whoever she is with if I am the third person coming into the conversation.

This always happens with me. If two people are talking I am never welcomed into the conversation and it is made clear that it is a two way conversation, however if I am having a conversation with someone else and a third person comes over, then they are welcomed into the conversation with open arms!

Why does this happen? How can I stop it from happening? Today I just walked off without saying bye as I felt that my friend and her friend were very rude. I was actually in the middle of telling my friend something too when her friend joined us.

"Today I just walked off without saying bye as I felt that my friend and her friend were very rude."

Yeah that's what I would have done; my attitude would have been, "bollocks to them!"

That is exactly how I felt, MadeMan.

I know it was childish to walk off but even if I'd have said bye I bet they would not have heard me.

This isn't a friend. It is someone who will make do with you until the better option comes along and you are no longer needed.

Find someone else to walk with.

If it's just this friend, then she's not being very nice. But if it happens to you all the time then you might want to think about whether it could possibly be something you are doing? Are you having a hard time at the moment and find you can't stop talking about it? Do you overshare? (My mother's pet phrase for people who bored her was 'you ask them how they are and they tell you.')

"I know it was childish to walk off"

I don't think so in this circumstance. Just hold your head up and perhaps do like magoria says; find other people to walk with.

Yep, this is really rude and tbh I distance myself from the school run as much as I can. I set off as late as possible, get there as the children need to go in or 2 minutes before and then hurry back home. I've always got something to be getting on with, and I can't be doing with 'friends' like the ones in your OP.

No, I'm not at all like that, SolidGold. If anything I listen more than I talk and I'm definitely not one of those people that has to talk and talk.

It probably happens to me because I'm fairly quiet and probably because people know that I won't make a fuss.

Ironically this woman actually waited for me and wanted to walk with me.....until a better offer came along of course.

OP, I don't know you so I have no idea whether you are a boring conversationalist or not. But as a general rule, if a lot of people react in a partciular negative way to you, then the problem is quite often something you are contributing to yourself.

Urgh, people like that... The 'better offer' types are best ditched as fast as possible. I hate that! So rude and unnecessary!

Any ideas what I could be doing wrong then? I am at a loss as to what. Perhaps I let people take over the conversation too much but how can I stop them?

"Ironically this woman actually waited for me and wanted to walk with me.....until a better offer came along of course."

Next time just walk with a purpose as if you're going home and have the attitude that she's welcome to join you if she wants, but you're busy going home anyway. Then if down the road she holds up for others or stalls a bit, you just carry on home like you don't care.

Sometimes attitude counts for a lot. If people sense you don't give much of a toss, then they sometimes change their behaviour as well, but if they don't, then it doesn't matter because you don't give a toss anyway.

^this. Care less.