Is age just a number? Make or break time!

[Ellexx]

Please give me some advice :-). I am 24 and have recently began dating a very handsome guy for approximately 6 weeks. However there is one problem that is really concerning me and I feel like I'm not letting myself get too close because of this! The problem- his age.

He has recently just turned 20, it's not particularly the age gap that bothers me but more the knowledge that men take a lot longer to mature and my parents have always emphasised that dating a guy older than me would be for the best. Tbh I haven't yet determined whether he's mature or not- look wise he actually looks older than me! 6ft 3 and very built, but that's not really the issue.

I have been honest from the start to him and stated I wasn't sure whether I wanted things to progress due to this problem, he said he respected my feelings and he couldn't change that. However I feel since that we have both got more attached- him in particular and he's recently bought me some lovely birthday gifts. I also think he wants to still see where it goes, but he understands my thoughts atm.

I guess opinions and your experiences would be really useful right now! I really don't want to hurt him and I'm worried I'm leading him on- especially as we do act like we're a couple which is probably confusing for him!

Thank you In advance :-)

Some people, male or female, are level headed, trustworthy, decent, and quite mature at 20. Some aren't. We are all individuals so take your parents opinions with a pinch of salt and do your own evaluation of your relationship according to how you are treated...and in actions, not necessarily in words which are easy to say.

All 20 year olds cannot be put in the same box, that's ridiculous of course.

I know people immature in their 40's and 50's. Maturity is not to do with age, the number. It's about who they are, their opinions, their history/experiences and their attitudes towards life and responsibilities and relationships.

PS. One of my friends is 30 years younger than me, yet we get on so well, share views and look at life in a similar way, laugh lots and have been friends for 15 years now.
Ok, not a relationship but when people connect, they just do and don't care about what others think or say.

I was 30 when I met my DP who was 20 at the time. That's a big age gap! He is 24 now. I have never felt he has been immature - his approach to life, both the ups and downs, is far more level-headed, rational and considered than mine. Age is indeed just a number. Go for it.

Please don't worry about a little thing like age. When I met my OH I was 29 and he was just 21. It started out as just (!) a physical thing, but developed over time. This year we celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary. It's been fabulous from day 1 (she says, crossing fingers). If it feels right, go for it, you stand just as good a chance of it working as any other couple. Good luck!

I think you are influenced too much by what your parents think.

If you like him then carry on seeing him.

You've only been dating six weeks, if you're not sure whether he's mature or not then you should keep dating and see what you think when you make your mind up.

The other day my boss said to his nephew who is 24, 'don't settle down young you will only regret it, have fun whilst you can'

I met my DH at school and we were married by the time we were 20. We've had well over 30 years of fun together and there's no sign of anything getting dull yet When I read some of the sad and difficult relationship stories on here I thank my lucky stars.

The most important thing is the relationship and knowing when it's good between you or not. If it's good then the rest falls into place.