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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Ever have vivid dreams about an Ex?

29 replies

JamSarnies · 09/04/2015 20:49

And then wake up feeling a bit confused and possibly sad, wondering what's going on in their life and whether you should get in touch? I consider myself happily married, have 2 young kids, but every now and then dream about an ex who I have no contact with but still have strong feelings about. I then feel a bit out of sorts for the rest of the day. But fine the next day when its all forgotten about! it happens about 4 or 5 times a year maybe. Its a bit irritating and slightly disorientating really...anyone else?

OP posts:
UncertainSmile · 11/04/2015 16:22

Strange really, as I quite like her.

Totality22 · 11/04/2015 19:00

I have several dreams about my Ex a year.

I think a lot of mine is linked to guilt though.

He wasn't perfect [undiagnosed MH issues] but he adored the bones of me and I never really felt the same way.

We were together for 5 years, lived together but I was never truly happy. I stayed as it was the "easier" thing to do. Gradually it ate away at me though and I became increasingly unhappy.

It all came to ahead when uncharacteristically we had a massive argument, it got very ugly not violent but I was pretty shaken up so I walked out.

Ex expected that we'd patch things up, as I say it wasn't a regular thing, but the moment I left I felt free and I never went back.

I wasn't completely honest with him to begin with, I maintained a friendship for a few months as I didn't want to cause more angst but eventually I had to take a deep breath and tell him that a) we'd never reconcile and b) I'd never been madly in love with him and c) I had met someone else (my current DP, who I met a few months after leaving Ex)

I felt free leaving my ex but the guilt I carry for the way I hurt him manifests in my subconscious and I dream of him still almost a decade on.

hereandtherex · 11/04/2015 20:52

Vivid. meaning realistic i.e waking up and spending a few minutes to try and sperate the dream from relality. I once dreamed my brother murdered someone. It was so vivid and disturbing I rang my mum up and asked where my brother was.

Or vivid meaning sexual?

Granville72 · 12/04/2015 16:19

I think in any context.

I've had some where I've woken up and thought WTF and taken a while to get my bearings. Some have troubled me for an entire day afterwards.

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