I have felt for ages like things are going downhill with dh, I have tried speaking to him about how I feel but he just cant see it and thinks I'm having a go so for the last couple of weeks I have not mentioned it and carried on as if everything is fine. Today however everything has come to a head.
We are supposed to be going away for the weekend tomorrow but I don't know what to do for the best now. It has been booked since last year and we have the money to pay for it but have just had a row because he's sick of being skint all the time. We do have tough times where we have struggled due to us both being self employed but what does he expect me to do, tell my son in the morning that we are not going?? I don't know where this has come from and don't understand why he has decided to bring it up now.
I think to be honest this is just the tip of the ice berg. For a while now he has been quiet but will not tell me what's wrong. He has recently started working with a lad who is younger than us, who he gets on well with and I think he seems a bit envious of his life. He talks about him none stop saying that this lad has more money than us and owns his own home (we rent) he has got more of a social life than us as he has no kids etc and I think that's what dh wishes he had. Since dh has worked with him his attitude towards me has changed quite a bit and I get the feeling from him lately that he would rather be at work than home with me and ds.
If we all happen to be in the same room at the same time he will make excuses to go off and do anything except be with us. He is snappy with ds and makes no effort with him. An example would be today ds is off school and dh should of been working but got the day off last minute I was really pleased as we hadn't all spent quality time together for ages but dh decides last minute to go out on his own instead.
I feel so lonely like I am losing him. When he is home from work he hardly says 2 words unless its work related. I have told him tonight exactly how I am feeling and he told me to stop nagging him. We are like strangers living together I'm in bed and he sleeps on the sofa every night. He isn't good at expressing how he feels so it leaves me having to guess.
I don't really know why I have posted this as I don't think anyone could really help me, I just needed to put down in words how I feel and I don't think I have done a very good job at that. Sorry if it makes no sense!