marriage coming to an end

[reallifesucks]

ah, not sure why i'm writing here, but it might make it more real.
Been married 8 years, things have got progressively worse the last 4 years due to redundencies, moving country, study, depression, small children.
We made a poor attempt at counselling together, he started taking meds and soon stopped. Always hoped the next thing would 'fix' the situation, once we moved, once he got a job , current one is once he finishes his study. An accidental snoop previously led me to some email exchanges that he had with another woman. He has previously admitted to kissing someone, and now i've just found a list of escorts...... so much for trying and giving us a shot.
Can't imagine taking the big leap to break up our family, the children will be gutted.... how do people cope having to share their children between two homes ?

I'm in no way the words of wisdom but thought you might need a reply before the more helpful than me see your post. Everyone copes, you will and the children will. I know it doesn't feel like it and believe me I have been there but you take what is thrown at you and you cope with it. Sorry I couldn't be more help.

Yes, I imagine the new reality will be difficult for you and your children to adjust to but you will adjust. Children are amazingly resilient, they are incredibly perceptive as well. So when you are content they will know. You are unhappy now, I bet they know.

You need to be happy. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to be treated with love and respect. Your husband is not worth it. He is weak. Many people go through what your family have gone through but they don't resort to infidelity.

It is hard but in your situatiuoon happiness (for you and your children) would only come through ending the marriage.

unfortunately we cannot make people change. I am in a similar situation and have just posted a new thread. I think you can only decide if you and your child are happy. And if you are not are you brave enough to make some changes. It's taken me a couple of years to get to that point, it's a scary thing thinking about being on your own, but it sounds like you are not happy and I think you deserve better.

Thank you all for your kind words. Its making me cry, but thats a good thing, i'm always trying to be strong, i have good friends that i have mentioned a few things to but haven't been totally honest as i haven't wanted them to dislike him. and you are right Yvette Chauvire, people go through worse and don't resort to infidelity.
spotted your thread Marmitey and yes, i am the same, worn out trying to make him happy, i have lost myself in the process. good luck to you .
No i'm not happy, but i'm not sure how brave i am to make a change. i keep thinking there is this little bit of hope, that he is a decent guy underneath all this crazyiness