I had a bit of wobble over nothing last night, help me find a way to get over it

[yorkshirelass79]

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when she said 'that should have been me' - you are assuming she meant being with DP. She might equally have meant being "sorted" like you seem to be.

She was probably not saying anything very profound or meaningful as regards you or DP - just that she doesn't like where she is at the moment.

Trust yourself and your relationship with DP, support her when things are tough, and be grateful it is not you.

Wish i had some good advice - didn't want this to go unanswered.

To tell you the truth, i would probably take up your dp's offer of only seeing her together. Not saying they would ever do anything but why put yourself through the anxiety. Understand completely how you feel.

You're right yorkshirelass - men are so tactless sometimes. As she is such a good friend, I doubt she will have meant anything by it apart from expressing dis-satisfaction with her life at the moment. But maybe a small part of your DP was flattered so he chose to interpret it as her wishing she was with him. And then told you because.... well because like we've said men sometimes do not have the 'tact' chip.

My DH often tells me if he gets chatted up or if he thinks someone flirts with him. I'm not saying he's making it up, but I do think he sees what he wants to see sometimes

Personally I wouldn't ask him not to see her alone as that just creates an idea in his head that you should have somethimg to be worried about - when you don't.

I think take heart that he has been so honest and up front with you and has offered a perfect solution.
He sounds like a good man, you are normal to be a little insecure and worried, he ahs given you a way to alleviate it so accept it for now at least until your friend gets over the rough patch.

Hi hun

Personally I think dp should not have said anything, considering everything else that is going on at the moment. But yes, men are tactless sometimes as we have said.

Dp loves you, and I think you are being very gracious accepting his friendship with L, particularly as she is ovb feeling lonely and vulnerable atm.

She should not have said 'It should have been me' because in my mind that implies she wishes it was, or why else even say it?

L is a bit mixed up atm and is probably feeling a bit jealous, if not of you and dp, but of just what you have together?

I don't know. But I do know what is going on right now could be affecting your judgement, and as far as dp goes you have nothing to stress about.

These bloomin wobbles are a pita aren't they? we're all entitled to them though.

Dh is out tonight if you want to pop along. Don't feel you have too, I'll be there if you want me.

xxxx

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You're being remarkably restrained, I think. Admirably so and definitely the right way to be.

I would be racked with worry and doubt and probably ban DP from seeing L and I probably wouldn't want to see her either for awhile! But I'm not saying that's a good reaction. I wish I could be more like you!

How exactly is her life a mess? Is it because she's single and doesn't want to be? Is there anything specific you could help her with?

You are taking the situation with your mate and your bf extremely well, you deserve a medal for accepting this. I would go mad and bar their friendship. Another way of looking at is how would he feel if it was you and his male friend?

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