Living with the Ex?

[Redderick]

Ok this is my first post on here, been lurking a while and seen some great advice so here goes......
I've been seeing a guy for about 6 months he's great, very attentive, straight and honest! About a year ago he committed to buying a house with his then (very short term) girlfriend who he had known for years. They split up before the sale went through properly but decided to still go ahead with the buy as it made a sound financal investment. Anyways along comes me and I'm finding it very difficult to cope with, ignoring the fact that I think she is taking him for a mug due to the financial situation she is in (this is the only way that she would be able to get a mortgage), but I'm also noticing that my green eyed monster is creeping in And I'm not really sure as to why? I'm pretty certain nothing is going on, she has a new bf and they live very separate lives but I'm going from a generally placid easy going person, to becoming quite resentful and bitter! Any advice, anyone else been in this situation? He has told me its a 5 year investment and that he will then sell his part to her, in the mean time he can rent out his rooms but it's far too soon for us to think about living together. So am I creating a problem where there isn't one? Should I trust my gut/ jealous reaction? Am I being an idiot?
Hope ive posted it correctly!

It doesn't sound like she's 'talking him for a mug'. He wouldn't have been able to buy without her, either - the fact that they are both seeing new partners doesn't mean either one gets to walk away with the house and the money from it.
Is your resentment due to the fact that you will be unable to buy a house unless you do so with another person?

He has another house, and pays half the mortgage on the house his child lives in and the idea is that she will then buy him out eventually, maybe you've hit the nail on the head as in if I do pursue this relationship i'm potentially stuck with her for another 5 years, maybe that's where the jealousy comes in, I'm trying to convince myself that its not the parts where they walk the dog together, cook together and go house shopping together as I think that's irrational of me. I own my own flat where he spends a lot of his time- but I'm still resentful, I'm just being mean aren't I?

Hang on: he lives in a house with one ex-girlfriend, half-owns 'the house his child lives in' - presumably with another ex-partner, and has a separate house of his own?
FFS don't buy property with him. I've heard of men who are serial impregnators as a way of keeping all their partners aware of them and obliged to consider them even after a relationship ends, but this man seems to be a serial mortgager - tying women to him even after they've dumped him by means of financial bondage.

Of course you're jealous, he's living with a woman he used to have coitus with. Doesn't mean he's doing anything though, she could have friendzoned him ages ago.

I'd play it by ear, accept that there will be jealousy but don't let it cloud how the situation really is.

"About a year ago he committed to buying a house with his then (very short term) girlfriend"

This would have me running for the hills, especially when he then decided to go ahead with the purchase even though they had split. This does not sound like a man with a firm grasp of economical common sense.

I should point out that the (short term) girlfriend and him had been friends for around 10 years before they started dating (around 3 months) in which time he agreed to buy a house with her. I've got to know her reasonably well.
pocketsaviour - i think you might be right about the economical common sense part- or lack of!?
I do really like this guy- have known him for much longer than the 6 months that we've been dating; i'm just having a really hard time with this current house he's bought, the one that the ex-wife and child lives in fine- that's an agreement they've come to, he has another house that he rents out (its miles away) and then this house he lives in and is doing up with this ex? who i seem to be stupidly jealous of for no real apparent reason
i'm genuinely in a conundrum!!

OK, so he fancies himself as a bit of a property speculator, by the sound of it (which would have me running for the hills anyway). Perhaps in time he could move out of the current house and into another one while retaining his financial interest in it, particularly as it sounds as though he and his current female housemate are on friendly terms.

However, you have only been seeing him for six months. It's a bit early to be laying down the law about where he can live, and a bit early, really, to be fussing about commitment.

So they live together, cook together, take the dog for a walk together and shop together but don't have sex?

Sounds like marriage to me. Seriously op this would be too weird for me.