Narcassisstic Mothers

[Marjie3]

have recently been reading the damaging effects of having a narcissistic mother. Wondered if anyone out there has had a similar experience and how you overcame the dreadful consequences of this toxic parenting.
Even though my mom has been dead for nearly 20 years, I am only just coming to terms with how it has effected me and how difficult it is to talk about it. In some strange way I feel I am betraying her by just posting this thread.

There are a lot of us out there but society doesn't readily accept the concept. So anytime we question their behaviour we are put down by everyone. It's how they (narcs) get away with it. Because people can not believe a mother etc would be that way. It really hampers our healing.

Go have a look at the stately homes thread. There are lots of people there with narc mothers. The first post will have lots of resources for you to look at as well.

I don't think many people do get over it. I think for some it is like a bereavement. We mourn the loss of the childhood that we should have had.

Deep inside there is a very lonely place which can only be eased by a mothers love.

It is not helped by those around us, who judge us for the way we feel about, or treat our mothers. They have no concept of what we went through. Mother would not believe us if we told them.

That should read they woul not believe us, bit of a Freudian slip there.

There is a good book called "horrible mothers" which is worth a read. Apologises I don't have the author's name to hand. You cannot change it, understanding it helps. It gets easier, but never leaves really and although my life is a happy one it is one area which will always be sad.