What do you all think about going to dinner with a man on the first date?

[lottieandmias]

Some men really seem to push for this but I prefer a drink for a first date or a coffee - something low key so that if its a no, no not much is lost.

If you do go on a lunch or dinner date, who pays? My experience has been that I try to pay for myself but the man always insists on paying. I had one situation with a man where he was upset by my attempts to pay for myself. Then I started wondering - are there men out there who actually stick the woman with the entire bill????

I think that in an age where we want women to be seen as equal it doesn't seem to make sense to expect the man to take care of the whole bill. But generally I think dinner dates for a first date are a bad idea.

I can't drink alcohol at all because of my meds - it's awkward to explain why I don't drink on a date. It's hard not drinking because I can't relax enough then.

I'm a one glass and I've had enough person. So I don't like the sort of dates where men just want to drink as they frown upon me drinking coke. Also I end up starving hungry without food all evening. Had a date that didn't end well on Thursday because I'd drunk too much. So switching to coffee or lunch dates instead. I personally enjoy eating out but I understand that some guys don't ask as they think they'll have to foot the bill.

Dinner would be fine by me if I knew the person. If some random off the internet, not for me.

I've had a couple of dates where I've been drinking coke and the man has downed several pints, got a bit too drunk and started behaving strangely or inappropriately... it's awkward.

Coffee first I think, keep it short then if you need to and you can make your excuses to leave if he's not your cup of tea.

Nothing worse than being stuck for an entire evening for dinner with someone you actually don't get on with in real life and just wishing the evening to end.

some people are "foodies" - they enjoy the whole food scene, but doesnt have to be a posh restaurant, can be a pop up venue, market, takeaway etc

Don't do it, speaking from experience, it takes longer to escape!

I am talking out of my hat here, as haven't been on a date for decades - but isn't an activity (walk, museum, whatever) better than a sit-down anyway, as you are doing something and it's less awkward? And if it's going well then you can stop for coffee anyway.

Latara - omg!

An activity sounds like a much better idea, I agree.