confused

[Homefromhome12345]

Well, I will try not to ramble to much. I am new here so forgive me for not as yet picking up the abbreviations as yet.
I'm 53 separated on and off from DH for a year. I moved to emergingry accommodation with my DD who is aged 16 and has ASD. I myself am bi-polar, although I do cope with it ok.
I kept close to my DH as he is unwell and at the moment in Hospital awaiting a serious operation. Problem is I have met another man, he lives in the block of flats I am staying in.
Is it getting serious? well I guess yes. Though we can only meet if my DD is out somewhere and I know what time he will return. DD has said he does not want me seeing seeing another man. With his ASD I have to be careful.
New guy is nice, aged 42. Sex is good but that's not the be end and end all.
When my DH gets out of Hospital I am thinking of moving back with him to care for him, maybe for a month. Have told new guy this and he is not that happy.
Sorry, have rambled.

I think the new guy is a distraction you can't afford at the moment. If you're getting divorced and getting settled into a new life with your son (DD?) that should probably take priority. If this new man cares for you he will give you a little space.

Moving back in with your DH to care for him post hospital sounds like a really bad idea - I'm with the new man on that. He's not your responsibility, your son (who would presumably be with you) would be confused and I think you have to start as you mean to go on rather than back-pedalling and risking another on/off situation.

Just to let you know, DD stands for "dear daughter" and I think you meant "DS" (Dear Son)

This sounds like although you have separated from your H, you are still very involved in his life. I understand that if he is ill it's difficult to just walk away, but if you are separated (and divorcing?) you have no obligation to care for him. Social services will provide care in the home if he is unable to care for himself.

Can I ask what the reason was for the separation? And does your son see his dad regularly?

Sorry, I did mean DS. Yes he did keep close contact with H though he had not seen him I'm over four weeks. DS won't go to visit him in Hospital. I think part of it is down to his ASD
Yes new guy likely a distraction and I hate sneaking around but I do like him but probably still love my H. Sorry if some of this writing is mixed up but I'm using a not so Smart phone

DS has a fear of doctors, thinks they all want to give him injections!!

If you love your DH why have you separated?

Cogito, he has an on and off drink problem.
When he's sober he's the best man in the World.
He is what's called a binge drinker, maybe not drink for a year then hit it with a vengeance
I new this since I met him over 20 years ago.

Guess I'm maybe hoping for the good times we had to return

It's a shame to waste a perfectly good life waiting for a drunk to stop drinking.