relationship ending limbo anyone?Regrets?

[welshrarebitontheside]

Been swaying in my decision for almost 2 years. Starting to affect my health due to constant stress. Depressed and permanently irritable. Can't plan anything for the future even a holiday/reducing working hours, anything bc i need a constant get out plan. Avoiding joint social events. Unhappy relationship now affecting 2 young dc. How long did people take to decide? Did anyone regret leaving or staying? What helped people decide?

The whole not good enough to stay, not bad enough to leave is slowly killing me too so I will watch this thread with great interest. Please look after yourself though hun

How is being on your own possibly going to be any worse than what you're experiencing now? Is your partner abusive? Are you scared to be on your own, or scared of how he will react?

Thanks happy. Let's support each other x

I in same boat.

Been told to wait for "breaking point". Something will happen and you will get a chill and KNOW it is time.

May be something minor like a comment or an action, but once penny drops, you can decide to walk knowing you are sure.

Do it. A few weeks of pain and a bit of doubt but then comes the sunshine and contentment. Don't leave with the idea of meeting a fantastic new man or you may think you should have stayed! Being free is great.

my partner is not abusive..We are incompatible. Respect is gone. Grown apart. I don't want to go into the circumstances too much right now, have done elsewhere. He is also a great father.

I have no particular desire to meet someone else.

Should i see a lawyer or cab first? Scared of having to shell out loads of money.

I understand your feelings. I always thought to myself 'if this was my last year on earth would it be a waste? Is it the life I want to live?'.

Mamma digging - how long were you in limbo for? People keep talking about having epiphany type moments. That's what happened with my ex. He has a milestone birthday this year and i can't see me even motivated to do anything. Or be together.
Good question btw. Thanks x

Have sought legal and benefits advice today. Never gone this far before. Feeling bold, to get ticket out of limbo. Keep revisiting the horrible things that have happened over the years and it strengthens my resolve.

For me there was a final straw - something which told me quite clearly he had no respect for me - however, I had known that for years and should have left much sooner. You are right, the stress of knowing you are in the wrong relationship is very bad for you, I feel loads calmer now we've separated.

It took me a year to get my head around the fact that I didn't HAVE to stay with this man who is a controlling bully. When we married I very much believed it would be for life. I think he did too but his interpretation was that he could treat me like shit & I wouldn't go anywhere.

There was no final straw, just a slow awakening that I wanted out & that my DC deserved better. It has been 10 weeks since we split, it has been hard & he hasn't left yet but I feel so much better already. And I am eagerly awaiting his departure this weekend so we can finally enjoy being free.

My friends have commented that I am much more relaxed.

If your relationship is affecting your health & your DC then you need to gather your courage & make the break.

We'll be here to support you every step of the way