Dating dilemma

[addicted2cake]

Hi- not posted on here before so please bear with me. Been chatting to a guy I met online. Seems really nice and his texts have got quite flirty which has been great! Dilemma is that although I fancy him personality wise his photo just doesn't do it for me! He originally sent me a message and came across as very genuine which was why I replied and we got chatting. He wants to now phone me and arrange to meet up. What should I do? Arrange to meet to see if I like him face to face or stop texting him?

If he's a complete non-starter as a potential partner then it's pointless to meet up and give him false hopes. Poor bloke. Is he really that bad to look at?

It's probably best not to waste his time.

Be kind to him though, don't just 'disappear'

I have to say I did online dating for a few years off and on. Then was introduced to someone through friends thought he lovely bloke just shame I didn't fancy him. I was looking for 6ft stocky built (big hands) non smoker full head of hair ??. 5 yrs later he non of those but he makes me laugh, he has rebuilt my trust in men and I love him . Don't judge anyone by a photo ??

No he's not that bad at all - just not really my type- I'm hooked on his messages tho ......appreciate your honesty, you are right - wouldn't want to hurt anyone.

Oh LURKING that's such a great story. Still undecided as to what to do but he is so nice on text and I fancy his personality. He seems so genuine that I don't want to hurt him. Will make a decision soon...

If he isnt giving you butterflies in your tummy, listen to your instinct x

If you fancy his personality it might be worth meeting up. Everyone's different I know but I can think of plenty classically handsome guys I know who I don't fancy in the least because of their personalities and all the blokes I do find attractive (including my now DH) are funny and sexy but wouldn't necessarily look great in a photo!

I think you should go on a couple of dates with him before deciding. Look at where going on instant attraction got you in the past and take your time with this one.

I vote for meeting up with him. You won't be leading him on, it's a date to see if you like each other, nothing more. I think it can sometimes be hard to tell what people really look like in photos (I for one photo badly) and unless he resembles Quasimodo or something I'd give it a chance. I had a previous boyfriend I wasn't attracted to at first but because I was so attracted to his personality it made him physically attractive if that makes sense and I ended up really fancying him. It sounds like you really like him as a person so I'd at least give him the chance for you to suss him out in real life. If he still doesn't do it for you then you can always give him the "didn't connect so well in person" line.

I met my DP online and fell for him before I saw his pic. He is entirely the opposite of my 'type', which is dark, angular and brooding: he has ginger hair and blue eyes and is stocky. I love him deeply and he is, I fully believe, my soulmate. What's more, because I love him, I think he's gorgeous. Give this bloke a chance.

I met a guy recently who wasn't my type but we clicked through online chatting and texting. Met him and yep - didn't fancy him at all. Worth a try though because you never know what the chemistry will be like.

Meet him and see. Photos can be very deceiving - both ways :)

You ladies are fantastic. He does give me butterflies in his texts! Thank you so much for all your advice. I'll let you know how it goes ....

If your single then perhaps "your type" hasn't worked out in the past.

Give it a go, my DSis is out tonight with a guy she met online who wasn't her type, it's going surprisingly well after several dates.

I was chatted up online by a guy who was totally not my type. In the end I thought 'where exactly have my type got me?' So gave in and met him. We're now married and have a DD. Give it a go, you never know!

I also say go for it, photos are a snapshot of a mood or time. I had one of those butterflies in stomach starts with my now DH - I said he wasn't my type - but turns out he was in real life. Date him I say!

I'd go check him out.

You can't tell much from a photo.

I'm better looking in photos than real life tho which presents it's own problems ;)

I married the 'not my type' almost 30 years ago. Two children and a wonderful, bumpy, happy life later we're still going strong.

Give him an honest chance. You might be surprised. At least you won't wonder 'what if'.

MEET HIM!

If it was all about looks on first sight then ugly people would never bone!

Chemistry matters. You might fancy the pants off him.

I met up with a guy from online a few years ago, got on really well but knew he wasn't my type. Fell head over heels, had an amazing experience. It ran its course and we went our separate ways, but i wouldn't take back a second of it. It was an amazing learning experience for both of us.

I don't think you can get chemistry through a photo.
Meet up in person, and if it's still a non-starter, you can let him down after your date. That's what dates are for: to assess your attraction to someone.
Since you like chatting to him so much, it's definitely worth a gander.

Butterflies when you haven't met someone wouldn't mean you're going to hit it off.

My experience, you just don't know til you meet someone. Just suggest a coffee, say it's not a date and that you would just like to chat to him in person and see how it goes.