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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Anti anxiety meds etc? Are they any good?

16 replies

TheOldWiseOne · 20/02/2015 07:02

Can I ask for people's experiences with these please? Do they help? I can't get the churning out of my stomach after my husband walked out 10 days ago without telling me? I wake in the night with it..I feel sick a lot of the time..are they going to cause me more problems than they would help? Please..any experiences...

OP posts:

FrankTurnersGuitar · 20/02/2015 07:15

Short term yes they will help, I found rescue remedy more helpful.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 20/02/2015 07:16

I'm sorry this has happened to you. It's really for your doctor to determine whether medication is appropriate or would be helpful to combat your symptoms. It's normal to feel intense grief in the early days and to a certain extent you can't escape that. However, if it carries on being intense for a long time and/or is preventing you from functioning then talk to your doctor. Good luck

Original poster

TheOldWiseOne · 20/02/2015 07:41

I haven't done much at all for those days - one trip to the bank to open a new account because I had to. My life is just sitting on my sofa and feeling sick. He left without telling and won't say where he is. He met with me once to say that he is getting counselling. I am just so fearful and don't have anyone here really as we just moved to this area. I just feel so alone.

OP posts:

CogitoErgoSometimes · 20/02/2015 07:43

ADs won't stop you being alone, unfortunately. That's not to say that they are a waste of time but they can only alleviate the worst of the symptoms, they can't change your environment. Do you have no one you could pick up the phone and talk to? No one who could pay you a visit? Do you work?

Original poster

TheOldWiseOne · 20/02/2015 08:00

I don't work - retired. No family here.My son is an hour or so away. I have my brother on whatsapp and one good friend who doesn't live here but she has her own issues right now with her mother dying. We only moved to this area 6 months ago. I think i will try to see a doc later today. Thank you to those who have answered.

OP posts:

kittentwo · 20/02/2015 10:37

Diazepam very short term an cbt therapy. Diazepam good at helping to feel more rational.

xiaozhu · 20/02/2015 11:15

I've been taking Sertraline for years and found it to be an absolute life changer. However, I have chronic anxiety/depression i.e. an underlying condition rather than anxiety triggered by a specific event.

Perhaps in the short term anti-depressants might help you get through the initial shock and grief, but unless you have an underlying condition they shouldn't be relied on for a long time. They have side effects, such as loss of libido, which may be damaging to future relationships (I know it sounds impossible now but you will have relationships in the future, once the dust has settled!) Also once you are on them they are quite difficult to come off, as they cause horrible withdrawal symptoms.

You need to speak to your doctor, although assuming he/she is NHS they are likely to just prescribe pills. If you have the money, I would highly recommend seeing a CBT therapist (I know the NHS provides them but there is a waiting list). In the end this was what really helped me through some dark times and gave me coping methods for life crises rather than just numbing the pain with pills. I had to try a couple of therapists before I found the right fit, but once I did that was the beginning of the road to 'recovery' for me.

GooodMythicalMorning · 20/02/2015 11:22

So far I have been taking a low dose for about four weeks and they help a little. Not as much I was hoping but then it is only 10mgs three times daily. Im hoping my gp will up mine next time I see her as I still feel rubbish.

MrsGolightly · 20/02/2015 11:22

So sorry to hear that OP. IME AD's helped me enormously when dealing with anxiety but, like a PP, it was a long term problem for me. See the doctor and get some advice from them. Don't feel alone though, keep posting. Sending you and a hug.

DemelzaandRoss · 20/02/2015 11:23

Citolopram is a very effective anti anxiety drug, but in my experience you can end up a bit detached from everything & at the moment you need all your wits about you. Also, not everyone, but some people do feel odd for a while when you come off them. I know I did. It's no comfort to you at the moment, but that awful stomach churning will eventually lessen. In the meantime, try & get out as much as you can, if that's possible.

MrsGolightly · 20/02/2015 11:42

Good advice there from Demelza - walking helps me, when i've had problems in the past with anxiety I would just get my trainers on and walk for a couple of hours - clears you head, makes you more tired so ability to sleep is easier. Try it, really will help.

Original poster

TheOldWiseOne · 20/02/2015 15:01

Many thanks to everyone who has kindly posted. I did see a doc this morning (urgent care) and got some sleeping pills as the churning wakes me in the night but he wants me to see my own doctor re anything else next week. I can get to sleep but wake up and am having horrible night vision things - like ghosts at the bedside. Am sleeping with the light on.

I am waiting on a call from a therapist about seeing her. It just all seems so unfair....

OP posts:

xiaozhu · 20/02/2015 15:53

Well done OP, you are being very proactive. Don't let the bastard grind you down.

proudmummy2 · 20/02/2015 16:31

I've suffered from anxiety since 11 years old, I have always had a problem with medication I won't even take a paracetamol I'm that bad! I thought I could fight my anxiety and 'just deal with it' however recently I've learnt that's not the case, 13 years after trying to 'fight' my anxiety has turned into generalized anxiety, OCD and social anxiety so I went to my doctor as I could simply take no more, I've been brave and accepted the help I needed and have been on medication for only 4 weeks and I feel absolutely fabulous already hope all goes well for you :) xxx

jesy · 20/02/2015 16:38

The old one

It's been interesting to hear ppl experience.

I have an anxiety attack wake up with palpitations and I vomit , been offered meds by my gp but I'm reluctant but it been good to hear others thoughts.

I'm a actually considering st John wort.

So sorry he left but I'm sure you'll be supported

Thymeout · 20/02/2015 17:02

If your the shock/distress is interfering with bodily functions like eating and sleeping, I would ask to be prescribed anti-anxiety meds to protect your physical health. I was given a low dose of anti-d's and enough valium to cover the period until they kicked in. It made all the difference to being able to eat, sleep and cope with daily life until I was back on track.

If you're just feeling sad but functioning normally, it's probably not a good idea because you will only be putting off dealing with your emotions, which you will have to do some time.

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