Very regular poster on here but have to change my name as a couple of people know me, so not a troll honest.
I work pt a couple of evenings a week. I have 2 children, the youngest 6 months. At work, everyone thinks I'm great fun, it's a young crowd there and although they know I'm 32 they treat me like someone young and fun and single even though I've been married a decade now. At home, Dh treats me like his employee and keeps on at me about the chores and stuff and it just really gets me down. I feel like I've given everything up about me for him. We met at 18 and I cancelled gap year plans for him, I relocated after uni to marry him, I gave up a successful career to have children (my choice too). There's a young lad at work who I'm really good friends with, he is 20 and just makes me feel like I'm young. I just want to go back 12 years and do it all again a bit differently. I feel totally tied down and like I've had to lose my personality to fit in with dh. The guy from work told me he was leaving today and I got so upset on my way home because I just feel like I've wasted so much of my youth and freedom by settling down so early.
Reading what I've written makes me feel like a sad middle aged person having a mid life crisis, but I'm too young for that (I hope). Are these feelings normal? Do a lot of mums who give up things feel like this? and what can I do? I've tried talking to DH but he doesn't "get it" at all. I just wish I could be 20 again (but slim and beautiful this time) and run away and sow some oats. Settling down with my first boyfriend was a bit different to that! Help!