My husband works abroad a lot - about 1 quarter of the year. I recently discovered that the information he gives me about who he is with/ where he is going while he is away is not the full truth. For example, he will say he is meeting his boss in the bar of the hotel he's staying in, but he will miss out the female colleagues who are also there. Or that they went on somewhere else afterwards. I feel like huge chunks of the truth are missing. He says he has been doing this for an easy life because I have issues with trusting him - this is mainly because he was very unreliable when we first got together, he would go out drinking with his friends and often just not come home at all.
I know that I am far from blameless here but I feel so angry and upset. I am at home alone with the kids while he is away and I just feel totally in the dark. It feels like he he can and does tell me whatever it suits him to tell me. It has got to the point now where I don't feel able to ask him anything about what he is doing because I would rather not know than feel I am being lied to. I recently told an old family friend what has been going on. She told me that it was my fault for not trusting him and that I owed him an apology. Maybe she's right - but I feel so angry with him. We have argued about it a lot and have now stopped discussing it. But I just cannot shake the feeling of betrayal. He is away at the moment and I just feel awful.