Why do I feel guilty have I made the right choice? so confused

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I have just ended my marriage after only a year - been together 11 years all the evidence is there he has cheated as I have ended up catching Clymadia and I know I haven't been anywhere else I have 3 tests that come up positive he has said he hasn't done anything and his test come up negative but I have spoken to a number of clinics who have said that the anti biotics he took for an ear infection could clear him up, unfortunately he has cheated once before 6 years ago when i was pregnant!

Just finding it so hard to leave when I do love him and feel guilty and sorry for him talking his children away and keep wondering if I have made the right choice but I know if I stay I'm always going to be like - what is he doing / where is he / will he do it a 3rd time and to be fair he isn't really making any effort to make things right, keeps saying he hasn't done anything - any wise words of windsom for me :)

Not much wisdom but in my experience once the trust is gone it's gone. Relationships without trust do not work.
You deserve better than a lying cheat. Oh and I've been told that about antibiotics too

Thanks thats what I keep telling myself no matter how much I love him I have to walk as will always be wondering - dosen't make it easier though!

I speak as someone who is now four months on from chucking out a partner over similar(ish) behaviour

No std for me, and no evidence of physically cheating

But since he was texting women with what he wanted to do with them I could not trust his sorry arse ever again

It hurts

I still now sometimes think what if

Then he tells me a pointless lie, or misses contact with the dc and reminds me what a twat he is

Making a decision is better than wasting your time drifting. If you think it's the right thing to do - and you know the full story - then have the courage of your convictions. Do you have real life support? Are others aware of the problems or can't you confide in anyone?

No wise words of wisdom, really. Just wanted to send sympathy and say "Go with your instinct..." You haven't done anything wrong.

Thanks - I know i deserve better but hard to imagine your life without someone you have been with for 11 years and have 2 kids with.

We moved abroad for his work so its trying to sort everything out to move back home - just scary the unknown - I know either way i will be thinking what if but he has cheated twice so if i forgive its like me accepting its OK for him to do it - ARGH life can be tough at times

He's a wrongun. Tough times for you when you love the guy. Have to move on without him, there's honest guys out there. Life will get better , may take a while. Best wishes x

Thank you! Feeling very emotional today as paying the moving deposit to move back home! Scary stuff! X

It seems to me that you are absolutely doing the right thing. You are not taking his children away from him, he has let you all down and as a result pushed you away. He has done this. I think you're setting your children a good example and showing them you have courage and self respect. Stay strong and good luck!

It should be fine thanks, have family and my house still there - just such a huge decision and loads of what ifs

Sorry but the antibiotics for the 'ear infection' was probably for the std.

You will be ok. I can't believe he risked your health like that! How dare he?

You gave him a second chance and he blew it. There's no way he's innocent. Staying would mean giving him a green light to do whatever he wanted.

There are so many lovely men out there who don't behave like this. Don't settle for less.

Thanks for all your kinds words feeling a bit stronger this afternoon :) x