I'm 30, took a year off dating to clear my head and work on myself, and while I am by no means perfect (still have lots of stuff I want to work on in therapy) I am having very strong pulls to get back out there and meet people romantically. Have had two serious relationships during my twenties (although one was more serious to me than him! hence the break up) but also had a reasonable amount of casual fun.
Bearing in mind it can take years to find the right person for the long haul and have children with, I feel I need to get my shit together and get a move on with the fertility clock ticking away. Fully aware the right person will probably not just come along without me doing anything, so need to put in some effort. I have read here a few times where women have said they almost treated finding a partner like a part time job. What exactly does that mean?
Because I've been away from the whole relationships scene for a while, I'd be happy to have some flings with nice decent people along the way and will just enjoy meeting interesting people, so I don't think I'll give off desperate vibes. I know myself a lot better in some ways now, in terms of knowing I won't tolerate bullshit. While I am lonely at times (in a sexual or romantic way - not lonely for friendship, I have lovely friends) I won't settle for just anybody.
Thinking of joining online dating (probably okcupid and guardian soulmates) and going to meetup events when I can.
Any other ways I should be proactive about this?
Am I being daft thinking I'd be happy to have a fling here or there if the person is respectful and kind, even though we may not be compatible long term - am I too old and too short of time to focus on anything else but finding a long term partner if I want children?
Any advice in general?