Hmmm...dilemma

[Rocklover]

As you may (or may not) know from my previous posts, I have recently separated from my husband. I have since met a really nice guy on the internet and we speak regularly on the phone, now he is asking to meet. He is in Holland and I am in GB and, in my mind there is no way I would want a serious relationship in this phase of my life.

The thing is, I think really fancy this guy (although will wait for meet up to confirm this lol) but previously I have only ever slept with my husband (yes I know...boring!)and it has kind of suprised me that I am majorly up for a casual relationship (we would only be able to visit every 3 months or so).

I am not a prude, but for some reason, feel kind of strange that I actually would really like a no strings sexual relationship, it would suit me at the moment, as I don't want complications right now, especially as my daughter is only 21 months.

The thing is for the first time in my adult life (I am 32) I feel amazingly liberated and truly at one with myself. Do you think I am being stupid wanting this or should I just be happy and go for it? (obviously making sure the meet up is afe in case he is an axe-murderer lol).

I am genuinely interested in peoples views on this.

Only you can know if this is right for you and I would not want to push you in any direction however, it TOTALLY sounds like you are ready! This sounds pretty perfect for what you are looking for at this time in your life, a casual relationship which due to distance is pretty easy to keep casual. Bearing in mind the obvious safety issues (please be careful and make sure someone knows exactly where you are going!) GO FOR IT!! And Good luck!

Word of Caution .... My brother and SISTER-IN-LAW met on the internet! And they are so perfect for eachother it makes me sick!

Assuming you've covered all the usual sort of questions like is he married, is he who he says he is, etc then I'd say that you are an adult and should do as you please. You're not stupid, just entering a new phase of your life. Is he ok with it being a no-strings sexual relationship as well? (that may be a stupid question ) I don't know your history Rocklover, how recently have you separated?

I don't think this is something that you can possibly decide until you meet the man. He may be nothing like you imagine, in a good way or a bad way, or even actually just as nice.

I think its also daft to enter into a relationship with a fixed view on how it will pan out. Because in my experience, life isn't like that. Its not just up to you after all.

My husband and I separated in July, hence why I am not ready for another serious relationship. Marymillington, I promise I am not going to force this man into anything he doesn't want lol!! I am pretty sure he is not married and having met my husband over the internet, I am pretty au fait with the safety issues. I have thought hard about this, I do realise that when we meet it may be a toatl gross out/disaster lol, but the fact is, I can honestly say I have never felt so confident about myself and that alone is liberating.

Thanks for all your replies ladies, they have been really helpful, I will make sure all the t's are crossed and i's dotted.

Have a good time, Rocklover

Good on you Rocklover.....btw I merely meant what if you want a casual fling, but he falls head over heels and proposes on your third date?