Help! when and how to tell new man you have a child?

[chanti]

Help!! I met a lovely man a few weeks ago and we've been out on 3 dates. I really like him and i'm starting to think i should tell him i have a daughter. Has anyone out ther been in this situation? I would really appreciate some advice! Thanks.

lol no i think its like buses, all over phone, not face to face, i guess they thought i was still not seeing the soldier

well one of them knew but thought he'd ask anyway

i'm not sure that my last post made sense

I just mentioned it casually on the third date and it wasn't a problem. The first two dates were just coffees for an hour or so and didn't make a conscious effort not to mention it, it just happened that way. He was fine about the 'news' though and is now my lovely bf!

It is a bit daunting in the begining though, so I understand completely where you're coming from chanti, it has put men off in the past, but as that was the case they weren't right for me anyway so better to let them know asap.

i always mentioned it before i met them,otherwise how could i answer when they asked what i do?some men were put off but it didnt bother me cos obviously i wouldnt have wanted to get involved with somebody who didnt like kids.
there is the other side though,where u have to be careful of men who are targeting single mothers to get to their kids.i would only reveal i had children if it was somebody id been chatting to for a while and it was looking like we might meet up.

it is a minefield, isnt it. I am usually upfront about this information. But maybe should give more thought to men who target single mothers to gain access to their children.

Some of the men on internet dating sites are really creepy, they are childless but put intheir profile that they want to meet a woman with kids. May be because theyre married and just looking for a bit on the side (which wont be me!) but maybe for more sinister reasons.

Hello ladies. I've nothing to report i'm afraid as i haven't seen him this week, but hopefully we are getting together on monday. I'm hoping it will come up in conversation organically, i don't want to have to sit him down and make a big statement. Thinking about it, when i say we've been on 3 dates, they were only a few drinks after work so we haven't really touched on our personal lives too much as it hasn't really been the right enviroment. Anyway, will let you know how it goes, and lou, what's your secret!!

Well ladies, I've told him and he didn't run away screaming! Really relieved he knows as i like him alot and didn't want to keep it from him any longer.
So far so good. Will keep you posted. Thanks for all your advice and support, it was greatly appreciated.