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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I want to leave my partner, but I don't know where to go

5 replies

snowface · 04/01/2015 13:11

We just moved to a new town together last year, and I haven't made any proper friends yet. I don't know what to do, we've had a really rough time and argued too much. Now it seems we don't want the same things in the future (babies). I can't see a future with us anymore but I don't know how to make the move when I don't have anywhere to go. I feel stuck.

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BitterAndOnlySlightlyTwisted · 04/01/2015 13:22

Do you have friends or family where you moved from? Anyone who could put you up until you find a job locally?

You might feel that you're stuck but you aren't really. You need A PLAN. Even if it means going into shared accommodation or becoming someone's lodger for a bit. Much depends on whether you have any savings or not. If you do, you could be out of there by the end of the week.

snowface · 04/01/2015 17:15

I don't really want to go back to where I moved from, I do have family and friends dotted around but I don't think I want to move back. I moved away for a lifestyle change and I don't want to go back to my old life. We were meant to be starting a new life here together but it is becoming apparent that we don't have the same ideas. It feels so wrong to make a plan without telling him, is that what people do?

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MincePiesPiesPiesPies · 04/01/2015 17:34

Wouldn't it be more wrong to not have a plan, tell him it is over and then hang around like a bad smell for ages while you work out what your plan is?

Decide what you want. Tell him what you are going to do. Do whatever that is asap.

MyTeethAreChattering · 04/01/2015 17:38

What lifestyle do you want (that doesn't involve a man)?

snowface · 04/01/2015 19:34

Yes MincePies I suppose what feels wrong is making the decision to leave myself without it being a mutual thing, and planning it advance seems like it would be more hurtful as it's very final then, Isnt it?
Chattering, we live in the mountains, both of our lives revolve around mountaineering.

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