I have been married for over 20 years. We have adult children. It's been up and down over the years. It was really bad when the children were small but I was trapped by a lack of independent income. No violence and nothing like the level of abuse that some women on this board suffer, just felt constantly criticised and unsupported.
Things have been better in the latter years but it's not a really loving relationship, just like people who share a house and are reasonably amicable, though I feel that I make more of an effort to keep the peace than he does.
Anyway, my Dad died two years ago. It was a long illness and I had to provide a lot of support, emergency dashes to hospital, overnights at my parents etc. Husband was spectacularly unsupportive, constantly complaining about me doing these things, generally making it all even more difficult than it already was. One Christmas when my Dad was in hospital, he sulked for a week because I wanted to be with my mum on Boxing Day.
Now, my mum is ill and in hospital. When I said I was coming up to visit her today, he threw a strop. I am so sick of this. I haven't got the energy to go through this again. I am currently in her house by myself and am hopefully going to fetch her home tomorrow. I can't stay here permanently as it's too far away from work but oh the temptation not to go back.