I started an affair with my friend

[JoanneInOxford]

I have never been with a woman before but things have been distant with my dh for a couple of years. My friend and I have become soul mates recently....and 2 weeks ago we went away on a course together and shared a room. We ended up sleeping together and it was amazing. We've seen each other almost every day since and I am in shock at how intense this feels. We are both married and I have 2 young children and she has 3. I think we should keep it completely secret but I know we're taking risks. I'm really unsure what to do....

[LadyCybilCrawley]

Consider that it's not "alive" that you feel - but that it's adrenalin - and this will wear off

Stop messing about a And Get some real life therapy to work out your feelings /sexuality

Then be honest with your husband and your feelings and go from there

If you are supposed to be with you friend, it can wait until you've done the right thing by your husband

[FelicityGubbins]

"I have had a few sexual fantasies about women" is very different from "I'm having a torrid affair behind your back, sweetheart" don't delude yourself into thinking you have an ok from him in what you are doing, because he swallowed a few breadcrumbs...

[Wrapdress]

I apologize if my comment upthread was offensive. I have had flings with women and received the condescending pat on the head from people who thought it was "cute" or "just a phase" I was going through or a turn on by men. These relationships/flings with women were generally devalued by others. I have never been married however, so not sure what it would be like as a married woman, so I apologize.

[tribpot]

I don't think I would tribpot. Which sounds incredibly selfish I know.

Not selfish. Hypocritical.