Online dating - HELP ……are these guys for real?

[JALG]

Hi Peeps, I need some advice re online dating- scam or no scam. Has anyone had a similar experience? I have been registered on a couple of sites and met 4 very dodgy guys in the past year. Last week I had a chap offer up his email, telling me he was coming off the site. I set up a gmail account (for safety ) and emailed him with a "hi there"! He then sent back the most unbelievable email. It was very well composed and showed someone either completely unhinged or very emotionally aware. He was from Holland. It went on to tell me that we only get one chance in life to meet 'the one' etc etc and what he wanted in life i.e.. he said he designed Oil Platforms, he wanted to cash in his investments and buy a big house in the country for his partner and a new family. There was a photo of an extremely good looking chap! It all seemed far to good to be true and as I don't suffer fools gladly I sent a really nice reply telling him how flattered I was and how , if he didn't mind, I would like some reassurance of his authenticity before I revealed any personal information. I sent it off, expecting a gushing reply and got nothing. 48 hrs later, I enquired if he had my email, and he said (in shouty capitals) WHY SHOULD I HAVE TO PROVE I AM AUTHENTIC, WHEN I DONT EVEN KNOW YOU, BE A LADY AND TELL ME SOMETHING ABOUT YOURSELF! Needless to say I told him where to get off and blocked him.

Next week I get a similar guy, just going going off the site (no picture) but here is my email address. I emailed him and he returned my message some 48 hrs later. The email was not so gushy and also showed he had read my profile as he commented on some of my points. He also said he was from Denmark and traded gold and gems into Europe, He lives locally and has not been married although he is 54. I replied, again saying that he sounded nice but I would not reveal personal information abut myself unless I felt he was for real. Bearing in mind his email was sent at 2am in the morning - I have not had a reply yet, giving me the feeling that this person only checks emails late at night. Also why is he just deleting his profile off the site although he said he had only been on there for a couple of weeks. Both emails were not alike BUT they both used the term "My Dear" which is quite old fashioned ? Does anyone else have any experience of this kind of message? What do you make of it - fake or real???

Do you mean Chrithh Eubank ? MadeMan

Skype seems to have scammers try to contact me most days , I block them straight away. Do any other MNers get unwanted people trying to Skype them?

IME free dating sites are full of scammers, married men, and the great unwashed - I'm sure there are exceptions

I met DH on a paid site. One that you have to fill in a long questionnaire for psychometric testing. I decided any bloke who'd pay that amount and fill in the questionnaire was probably serious about a relationship...and it worked

Men who have loads of money and want to cash in their investments to buy a nice house in the country are generally savvy enough not to divulge this information to random women on internet dating sites.

It's a scam.

I also think that someone who immediately wants to message you off the site is a bit of a red flag. The gmail address (good work for setting it up specially) will now have been sold on to a scammer database. Odds are you will get a few more too-good-to-be-true offers sent to it.

As others have said. Only message locals. And even then, bé wary as many are total fuckwits. Too good to bé true? Yes it is.
The replies I get prob are legit, but they'r not my type at all. (Females)

I'm a genuine OD er but get very little response, can't bé arsed with it.

Sorry OP I think the rest of the responses are correct. Sounds like scammers. If they are asking for email addresses or contact off the site immediately then that is a very quick clue. Scammers know they will be reported and blocked from the site quite quickly so they try and get a different contact method to keep you on the hook... If they are deleted they will tell you that they did it themselves once they met you.

Another sign is if you google parts of the text of their profile you will find it comes up in multiple places (generally the more flowery stuff) and reverse image searching will come up with different results too.

I had a batch when I was OD who would tell me how beautiful they thought I was and what a wonderful person...which would have been more believable if I had actually had a photo on there... There were lots of men around at that time who were very well educated, widowed with one child and who used the term "my dear" a lot... Scammers sadly.

Scams can be tricky to spot. It often starts out looking relatively ok. Then they have a problem and need a small amount of money. That money will quickly be returned if you ask for it. And now they have you hooked and believing them. Slowly the amounts increase for more "emergencies" that they can't release cash for and... Then poof they are gone. As are the life savings of vulnerable, trusting and often very smart, caring people.

That all being said... Keep safe, chat on the site as much as possible... And have fun! There are genuine people out there and you can have a good time meeting and talking to new people, even if they don't end up being THE ONE.

Deff Scammers or weirdos. My friend had experience of this on Match, guys story was very believable he claimed to be coming of site as he had had lots of weird emails from females just after sex ! They started communicating via email, he got very heavy very quickly claiming to be in love with her, talking about the future (apparently he was working abroad as an Army surgeon) he had done his homework he could answer all her questions. She kept it going but she always new it was dodgy, she just wanted to see where it would go. In the meantime she reported him to Match and they took down his profile...he didn't go off the site as he'd claimed. Anyway she got fed up and confronted him, she never heard from him again ! I was on Match the other night and his pictures came up, different user name, location job etc. I reported my concern and his profile was removed.
If anyone gets anything on dating sites they think is dodgy, they should report them and let the site do their job and investigate

btw I've used match and met some very nice guys, though no potential partners. I've found that it's best to be quite proactive and make contact with men rather than waiting for them to come to you. Most men have stories about Russian women contacting them, declaring love and begging to be sent the air fare to the UK. Scamming works both ways but there are plenty of genuine people on there.

If you're on POF you can set it to not accept messages from men with no picture

flatbellyfella yeah. I do get lovely 21yo sociology students wanting to do wild, wild funny things on video, who want my feedback on their performance.

Even though I've though I've told them I'm a 45 yo mother of two. Wooo, as if I want to see someone in their cami doing 'wild and crazy things"

I even chose a random collection of consonants and vowels as a name to put people off

OP .... throw these fish back in the sea. They stink.

How do you google a photo

Google reverse image search. Drag and drop the image you want to check and it'll come up with where else it is online. When I was doing OD I had so much fun doing this and reporting the shysters. Often if a man has just one great professional-looking photo (you know, even if it looks casual the lighting is perfect, etc) on his profile it was stolen. But one cheeky bugger, who claimed to be in the UK, stole a whole load from an American personal fitness coach's blog!
I also checked the text by Googling chunks of it. Made a fun hobby for a while

These two examples sound fake OP - but well done setting up the secondary email. I use a random email address too (no name or personal references just 2 letters and 2 numbers @ etc), I also use the Kik app for chatting/exchanging pics - it's like WhatsApp but you don't need to exchange phone numbers, just user names...and you can delete/block someone very easily should they become pesky