Too much food on my plate!

[Azzak]

DH does all the cooking. I've asked a few times not to put too much food on my plate... I prefer smaller sized portions and to go back for more if I'm still hungry. A comment I made last night about feeling too full after eating yet another massive meal led to big row.

DH insists I just don't eat what I don't want and leave the rest. Which then gets binned. If it's on the plate I tend to try finish the whole plate. In the past I've never had problems in managin my weight cos I used to run and cylcle and gym but Im really struggling at the moment and the feeling of being too full every evening is very ugh

He says all he wants to do is to please me.

Am I being unreasonable to ask for smaller portion to be served?

Surely if he wanted to please the op... he'd stop doing something that doesn't please her?

Id be hugely fecked off if my partner complained about his portion sizes. Do it yourself would be my response. Its got to be a joke. I would say. . I'll dish up my own..

My DP does this. I just eat what I can manage and save the rest for anther time. it's not a big deal, surely?

Clearly there are some people who don't have a problem where food is concerned and therefore don't see the problem.

Good for you if you're one of them but please dont belittle those of us who aren't like you. Perhaps try to be a little more understanding that others are different

Um, so get up and get it yourself.

My STBX did this with me. He was (probably still is!) a very good cook and enjoyed cooking - I did everything else in the house. When I hit menopause my appetite just went. I could not eat what I used to. He continued to pile the food on my plate and got huffy when I left it. He also would comment on the fact I wasn't as slim as I used to be but couldn't see the connection. Not saying that's what's going on here but it was definitely a form of control. Now I'm on my own I eat what I want, when I want. (And I'm also a size 10)!

Joysmum.. its not about having a problem with food and i am certainly not 'belittling' anyone.
If op is unable to say 'I'll dish up my own dear your portions are too big for me' then there are clearly far more problems than what's being dished up

This is just a bit daft really. In a 50:50 relationship, if a partner complained at how much I served him every time I cooked, I'd stop cooking for them. He can't predict your appetite and the vast majority of people will serve up an adult portion similar to the one they themselves are going to eat. You can always leave some. Or ask him kindly to serve yours on a side plate and you'll get up for seconds if you want more. No need to be annoyed with him over it.

Many thanks for all your responses. I was expecting comments regarding DH ignoring my request but instead responses focused on the food.

Yesterday evening I got a normal sized portion and the leftovers were in the pan rather than on my plate. Sometimes it seems to take a row to get them thinking.

I'm taking advice and next time i get too much I'll take my plate back into the kitchen and remove the food.

Thanks guys. Have a great weekend

Biggest first world problem I've ever seen!

Communication issues and feeling unheard or your wishes ignored is never simply a 'first world' problem

If my partner sat there complaining about his portion sizes and then said 'i was ignoring his wishes' he'd soon find himself doing his own cooking.

But let's pare it all back and reduce it to the fact that having 'too much food on my plate' is the ultimate first world problem! No matter what the other issues are, it's not a problem that the majority of people in other parts of our world need to post on an internet forum. Just an observation.

Ffs...I always put too much on Dh plate...better to have too much,and leave some then not enough

In my case, better to have not enough than too much as there's no difficulty in going out for seconds of having fruit or a bit of bread to mop up, there is a difficulty with leaving food on the plate for me. I can appreciate its different for others and can't help but be envious.

DH dishes up bigger plates than I do as well - but then this is the man that ate an entire curry cooked for two that filled the fry pan as I hadn't told him that I was getting my portion when I got back.

His rationale is that I invariably get seconds, so why not cut out the extra trip to the kitchen by dishing it all up at once. But to be fair to him he does listen and tries to give me a smaller amount.

He says all he wants to do is to please me.

Hopefully he has now realised that not listening to you and ignoring your express wishes, is a funny way of showing it.