Scrambled head

[Nobedsareheretonightmydear]

I have been in hospital with my baby since 6pm. He is being fed through a tube and is comnected up to a load of beeping machines.

I think I've been awake for 30 or so hours now and feel delirious. Was breastfeeding but they're feeding formula and my boobs are popping, I'm in pain. No beds on children's ward, so we've been in a&e all night. I stink. Hungry. Need a wee. Worried about my older children.

So why am I so sad about this: split up with husband two weeks ago and I moved out with our children. Messaged him last night to say I was coming in to hospital with our baby. No response. Messaged him again this morning - he tells me not to send him any more messages as I have taken everything away from him and need to let him 'get on with' his life.

I am beyond astounded. Please what should I do next?

(Apologies for typos I am actually feeling quite dreadful), my mum is coming in around lunchtime, but due to moving to a new area I have no friends here I can contact right now.

I split up with him as he has lied, stolen from me, been generally moody and uses drugs and alcohol, just for a bit of context.

I think his reaction totally confirms that you made the right decision to get away from him. Well done.

You took nothing away from him, he made that happen all by himself.

I'm sorry about your son. Can you ask the staff for a machine so you can express and feed him that way?

Thank you quite. I am coming to terms with how right it was, as each day it seems clearer. How could he reject our children!

Good advice about pump - hospital so manic it's madness.

Yes, why on earth are they feeding him formula while your boobs burst?! Any paediatric ward should have (or have access to) equipment to express and store EBM (expressed breast milk) to feed to baby.
I'm sorry you're going through the mill at the moment - your ex is clearly too self-absorbed to see that this is about his son, not him. You'll get through this, and in a funny way his awful behaviour now will hasten your healing - doesn't leave much room for regrets, does it!!

Thank you walk, as soon as we got on the ward I was given a pump and I got pumping. Such a physical relief, and I'm pleased baby is back on my homemade milk.

I feel sad, as it really signals a 'no going back' point. He really is an immature arsehole, thinking only of his own needs.

Thank you both.

Sending you and you baby love and strength