I have so much on my plate I need some advice.
My marriage is on the rocks. A few weeks ago it became borderline abusive. My husband threw an object at me. This was in a run of incidents, where my husband had chosen to lose his temper. I told him I didn't want to live like that, and he had to get anger management, otherwise the relationship wasn't going anywhere. I felt that he had crossed a line. Mentally I decided to give it six months to see if it got better. If not, then leave. We have a 3 year old child, two very demanding jobs and I thought it would be rash just to go.
A week later, with us still barely talking, his father was hospitalised. It seems likely that he will die, as the conditions he has are not curable. He sits at home with oxygen, incapable of doung anything. His father is an unpleasant, manipulative man, very narcisstic.We don't get on and years ago I went no contact after years of mad letters, offensive comments and insults. The final straw was when he told me that my mother was selfish for committing suicide. Now this man is dying, and my husband who is an only child, is feeling the pull to go home and help his mother, who is in her seventies. She cannot do it alone without some serious impact on her own health which is not good. They live overseas and have some care help but not much else.
I see that this a horrible experience for my husband, and that it will be emotionally a very tough time. And of course the natural feel as a wife would be to support him as I have always done. But I find myself very angry about the way he has treated me, and all I see is that my need will conveniently go on the backburner. Nothing will happen. I see that my husband has much on his plate, but so do I. This time, I feel very angry instead of sympathetic.
I don't know what to do.