Hi America1,
I'm in the same position as you, 33 weeks and split up with my husband 3 weeks ago. He said he didn't feel the same about me but I suspect there is another woman.
Call the bank and freeze your joint account asap, I didn't do this and there is now a huge overdraft I am jointly liable for, however I will worry about that later. Before you do it take any money out of the account that you can and put it in your own account, if you don't have one open one asap. We didn't have a mortgage so I'm afraid I can't advise you on that. We were living in rented, tenancy in his name, and he's already given notice on the house. I am staying with my mum now who is very supportive. We own all the furniture in the house and I think we will sell it and split the money, I'm letting him take responsibility for this even though I don't trust him, its not worth much money anyway and I'm not dealing with the hassle of it.
I saw a solicitor this week which was very helpful. A lot of solicitors will give you a free half an hour of advice so go and see one asap it won't cost you anything. Mine was excellent and spent nearly an hour talking to me.
He will owe you child maintenance from when the baby is born, he doesn't have to give you anything beforehand unfortunately. My solicitor advised me he would have to pay me spousal maintenance because on maternity pay and after that ends I will be unable to support myself and having a small child means the court can't say you have to work so he has to cover the shortfall (our plan was for me to be a SAHM so my contract at work is ending when I leave for maternity and I'll only get maternity allowance).
Her advice to me was file for divorce asap (court fees of about 400) and apply for interim maintenance while the finances are being discussed. A divorce will take 4-6 months but the interim payments could be awarded sooner. I could also claim my costs from him. She also said I could be awarded a lump sum from him as he has not given me anything towards baby equipment which I have purchased myself.
Child maintenance and spousal maintenance are separate, child maintenance is dealt with by the CMA and the court will deal with spousal maintenance and I think I'm right in saying that child maintenance is not considered part of my income as thats for the child. Check out the child maintenance calculator online if you know what he earns and it'll tell you how much he'll have to give you. Also check out the benefits calculators online too, I'm about to apply for tax credits etc. because you can do that before your circumstances change (i.e before I leave work to have my baby) so i can hopefully get that bit sorted before it arrives. There is also child benefit which you will get if you earn under 50,000pa. My next step is to go to citizens advice and ask if I've applied for all the benefits i'm entitled to as I'm trying to get this sorted before the baby arrives, but its difficult as I'm still commuting and working so my days are very long.
So basically I'm really sorry to hear you are in the same situation as me, its absolutely shit and I feel like my world has just crashed down around me and I know you must be feeling the same. However seeing a solicitor the other day made me feel really empowered so I would advise you do this asap. I'm supposed to be meeting up with my husband next week to discuss everything, if he shows up, I'm armed with a lot of information so that he can't walk all over me.
Keep posting, it'll be good to have someone to talk to in the same situation!