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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Considering separation but only work one day a week,need advice on what to think about.

4 replies

CantGiveAnyMore · 03/11/2014 21:48

I have name changed for this. As a few people know me and my husband.

I have been unhappy for a long time, and I know he won't change, and I don't feel respected or loved.

I am very close to separating, but we have 2 children (8 and 7) and I only work one day a week. I don't drive either and at the moment everything including school and work is in walking distance.

I am worried how I will be able to afford things, and want to keep the kids in the same school.

Parents live an hours drive away.

Please can I have some realistic advice about what I need to consider practically?

Thanks

OP posts:
CogitoErgoSometimes · 03/11/2014 22:37

You really need to spend a little time with a solicitor who can walk you through the specifics. Pretty standard would be an equal share in any marital assets plus a proportion of his disposable income in child maintenance. Spousal maintenance is less common these days. Shared parenting may free you up to work more hours

On top of that, there are various benefits. You may not be as badly off as you think

BitterAndOnlySlightlyTwisted · 03/11/2014 22:43

A lot depends on your specific circumstances. Like whether the home you live in is mortgaged or rented. If you hope to remain in the family home rather than finding a suitable rental, or selling up you need to consider how the mortgage will be paid with only child-support, child benefit and one day's work a week.

The good news: your husband will be expected to contribute 20% of his pay to you in child-support. (At least I think it's 20% for two children)

Whatever you receive from him will not be taken into consideration when calculating what benefits you might be entitled to.

The bad news: you might have to take on more work around your chidren's school hours. You need to work more than 16 a week in order to qualify for Working Tax Credits.

Have you had a look at the "turn2us" website and plugged in your situation and prospective income to see what figures it give you? Single parents with children are not badly looked after under our current benefits regime.

CantGiveAnyMore · 03/11/2014 23:07

Thanks for replying, home is mortgaged but no equity as prices gone down (but not negative equity)

Couldn't afford to stay in house by myself.

Could probably get some more hours in work, but only seasonal.

Am trying to get a job that would fit in with school hours, by volunteering and doing a relevant course.

OP posts:
avocadogreen · 03/11/2014 23:45

Have a look at the turn2us website, it is pretty accurate. Also the csa website lets you work out the minimum child support your ex should pay.

8 months ago my exH left me and 2 kids, I was a SAHM with no job. Now I have a great job, school hours only but not very well paid, but my income is topped up with child benefit, housing benefit, council tax support, and I should soon be getting tax credits once they finally process my application. I am actually not much worse off.

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