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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Lost Contact with brother.

3 replies

julezboo · 03/10/2006 14:50

Hiya

Just after a bit of advice really, my whole family is out of their mind with worry.

The last time we seen my brother was over christmas, he moved in with his very young, controlling girlf shortly after, she already has a son, and from what we have been told they lost a baby to mc just before christmas.

They have moved from salisbury to basingstoke back in february this year, that was the last anyone has heard from him, he rung my mum previous to his brithday in feb, she sent his card to my dads (who lives in salisbury) he had his birthday money and didnt even say thanks! He didn't give noone his new address, the only phone number we have is a mobile, which is always turned off, me and my mum try it regularly. As far as we are aware he is still working for the same decoraitng company he worked for, although there is doubt in this. We have contacted them and they told us they couldnt tell us anything, we knew it was a long shot anyhow.

He still up until recently had all his bank statements and post go to my dads. My dad discovered a few speeding fines, so he has likely to have lost his licence anyway. He had a car on finance before he met this girl, we have found out by him changing his address to my address, that he is now £3000 in arrears with these, he is/was on good money so could afford the re payments. They have moved in with her dad as far as we know, so they dont have to pay rent or other stuff.

This girl told my sil at christmas she thought she was pregnant again, if she was surely the baby would be here by now and he would want to share this. I am currently 20 weeks pregnant and Im upset and at a loss as to why he would do this, my mum has shed many many tears over him. I dont think he wants to be found, and Im pretty certain he knows hes in alot of trouble with money/debts and the speeding, we dont care about all this, and there is plenty of help to be had if he got in touch, he has my mums phone number/address but doesnt bother. I would love to track him down or at least get a message to him. But where do I start, i cant imagine christmas without him at all

Hes only 23 yrs old, not a baby and is usually so considerate of other people, how can he do this!

OP posts:
julezboo · 03/10/2006 14:53

forgot to mention, he also forgot to send his nephews and my mum a birthday card, which never happens. Short of driving round basingstoke (bit far from me in south wales mind) I really dont know where to start!

OP posts:
iamapieceofcheesecake · 03/10/2006 14:55

Could you try Genes Reunited, I know it's a long shot, but someone on there might know where he is. Sorry I couldn't be of more help.

KTeepee · 03/10/2006 15:07

No advice to give, but lots of sympathy. My brother has also changed dramatically since getting married to a girl he had only known for a few months. OK maybe my mum was responsible for nagging him to send birthday cards, etc before that, but it is still painful for the rest of the family to have virtually lost a brother/son and to have a nephew/grandson we know hardly anything about. We do have an address and phone numbers for my brother but the answering machine is almost always on and he lives abroad so we can't just jump in the car and call around....

I have made the decision to keep sending cards and presents to our nephew even if they are not reciprocated, so that at least he will grow up knowing he has an extended family and can make his own choices about contact when he is older.

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