I've been in a relationship for over a decade,we don't live together and see each other once a week and at weekends. We live quite seperaye lives for a couple of such long standing and I am insecure and quite suspicious by nature. Once before i found him registered on sexintheuk. He said it was just looking, an old account from before he knew me. I let him off,told him to delete it and said no more porn. I understand that's impossible but I meant nothing you join, there's so much out there why do you need to?
That was 4 years ago. This weekend he flounced off after a silly very small row. He left an email account open and I looked through it(all the way back 4 years!). He has subscribed to porn sites and one in particular distresses me. He also apparently went through a long period of impotence as he was buying generic Viagra for several years.
I can understand him not wanting to discuss the impotence, though I think he should have done whether he liked it or not as its an issue which affected us both and I noticed the never ending ness of it at the time. The porn sites have left me feeling very hurt and cheapened. I warned him that if I caught him again that would be the end and he would never see me again. That's how I feel now. Is it unreasonable of me to feel like this,especially about the impotence? I thought we had a great relationship, great sex after all these years together and now it just seems to have dissolved into lies. Am I making it all about me instead of focussing on his pain?(tough if I am,quite frankly).
L