Separation Agreement? How do I get one and make him stick to it

[ChickOnAMission]

STBExH is a financial mess. DD is at private school the fees are due on Monday, he can't pay.

The school offers bursaries, I have the form, it's simple, they just want to know how much money you earn and your outgoings... for me it would be easy to complete because I'm employed, it's all clear cut.

Ex on the other hand has his own business, gets paid offshore, owes money all over the place, is not up to date with HMRC in the UK - Therefore he has no official evidence of what he earns. He keeps promising to fill in the forms, but never does. Stupid Man is too proud.

He's a disaster. I don't have money to pay solicitors fees, and even if we got an agreement drawn up he won't stick to it. He'll just sign it, then ignore it. I really need to disentangle myself from this idiot.

Please give me some advice to get myself out of this mess... Has anyone got any experience of applying for bursaries, and even more importantly how enforceable are separation agreements? Next summer the 2 years separated will be up so I can apply for the divorce then.. but it's all still money though :-( of which I have very little.

I toyed with the idea of a separation agreement as thought it would soften the blow a bit for H - but in the end and after advice just decided to crack on with the Divorce. It's more costly to do a separation agreement and after 2 years having to pay for Divorce as well.

I don't have any experience of bursaries sorry.

Good luck

I'd second the idea of getting on with the divorce. The rest is just a waste of money.

I had a separation agreement drawn up when stbex and I decided our marriage couldn't move forward...but we had to continue to live with each other at times due to finances.
The best purpose it served was that it formed the basis of the consent order that has just been sealed following our Nisi being granted. We had full financial disclosure at the time and signed the terms of keeping our finances separate then. It was not legally enforceable, if I remember correctly as it was not court ordered/approved. It could have been used however if terms were broken as we had both had legal representation & signed it willingly and with all facts.

In terms of bursaries...if both parents live together they both need to fill out the application for the bursary; this also applies if there is a court order re fees being paid or it is stated in a separation agreement- whether it is adhered to or not.
You will need to declare all income for the past financial year, tax, NI and pension contributions; some schools ask for mortgage balance and statements too. You will need to declare all assets whether liquid or tied up in property, bonds, savings or accounts--it is basically to ascertain if there is any means other than the bursary that would enable the child to stay at the school. If both parents reside together, both incomes need declaring, along with p60, wage slips etc etc.
(I work in education!)

I hope that helps a bit, I can dig out the agreement & check wording etc if that helps or you have a specific question...mine was to protect me financially & not have any responsibility for his debts etc